The BrikWars Forums

Who is in for the forum RPG? I'll explain character creation and special rules later. Everything you must know in the beginning is this:

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Me Gork. Gork be ORK! Ork be loud, rude, agressive, mean. Meaning you kill ork over there because you don't like ork his hat. That you tear enemy's beating heart from enemy's his chest and eat it with mustard. That you permanentally are in state of barely controlled rage and that you always must fear broccoli.

You be Grunk. Grunk be Ork whithout name. Only name make ORK! Only when Ork have name he can appear before Krom and say: Me be (Insert name here) and you let me have a place at your table or I beat you up!
When you done great deed you can appear before the clan and sing name song. When song please clan and when song please shaman THEN you get name.

You understand Gork? No? You stupid! Gork beat up stupid Grunk!

So who think he be worthy to earn name?

Me Rock. Rock smash scissor, eat paper. Now me sing name song.

Rock, Rock, Rock.
Rock, Rock, Rock.
Smash the guys
guys are smashed.
Rock.

Me Snork. Me smash... Me smash... Me having trouble counting what I smash. Wun, tu, tree, fahr, me used that finger already, wahn, tiw,... Me smash EVERYTHING! Now me sing song.

Snork. Snork. Snork. Snork. Snork. Snork. Snork. Snork. Snork.
Snork smash you if you no give me name.

Me Spork. Spork has power of all cutlery! Me sing song!

Spork. Spork. Spooooork!
Part Fork!
Park Spoon!
All Spork!
Spooooooork!

You are sitting in a pit full of other grunks. You have been here as long as you can remember. You have been eating whatever you could find. Stones, dirt, dead grunk,..
When you start singing a big ork wearing fur appears above the pit.

"Grunks be quiet! Grunks sing when done great deed. Grunk do great deed when Gork say they do great deed. Grunk understand? NO? Gork turn you into frog!"

The big ork turns to move away.

"Rock smash Gork when he small and Rock big, then Gork know who big ork is."

"Ah, grunk have spirit. Gork like that. But grunk being stupid and anger shaman. Gork not can have that. ...So grunk want to be rock, yes? Then he shall be rock."

The big ork raises his staff of totems and barks some strange words. A flash out of the clear sky hits the grunk. The next moment the gruk is gone a big rock is where he stood.

"Anyone else want fell wrath of Gork, the shaman?"

He waits for your response. Most of the dozen grunks are clearly intimidated.

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Congratulations Silver, you just killed your first character. But there are still some other grunks left. For now.

OI Gork! are we gun smash gits?

Dork is me name. Me want for a complex society that utilize advanced technology. Me name song this:

Dork the ork
make nice fork
pop the cork
DORK!
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Dang, and I liked Rock too. I guess I shouldn't be so reckless.

Try to do things in the right order. You have to earn your names. And right now the shaman is eyeing you. You know he is one of the most powerfull guys in the clan. Maybe even more powerfull than the chief. So you better fear him.

How to generate a character: Distribute 16 points to the attributes Muscle, Spunk, Fumble Finger and MoJo.
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The shaman watches you for some moments. Then he speaks again:
"You all eager get name, Gork see. But grunk must EARN name. Gork will give dumb grunks chance to prove you worthy. So listen. GORK SAY BE QUIET! *He turns another grunk into a frog. It is immediately eaten by another hungry grunk.* Gork have important task. So show me You strong enough. Show me YOU clever enough. Then Gork will choose YOU to do important task. WHEN grunk survive AND complete task, then Gork will consider to let you sing name song. Grunk understand? Yes? Then show me strength! NOW!"

Hmm, what this? If me strike small rock against guy who wanted to be Rock, me get...

*FWOOSH*

Me has pretty orange burny stick now.

Edit:
Muscle: 3
Spunk: 4
Fumble Finger: 5
MoJo: 4

5 muscle, 5 spunk, 3 fumble finger, 3 mojo
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I know trick too! *Trys to kill snakemittens with a rock*

3 Muscle
4 Spunk
4 Fumble Finger
5 MoJo.

Maybe I should have stated that before:
Muscle: Important for melee, attack damage, climbing, jumping and smashing
Spunk: Ability to avoid damage in melee, endurance, first aid, sprinting, drinking and swimming
Fumble Finger: Percetion, ranged weapons, riding, sneaking (yes, even orks can do that)
MoJo: sense of smell, leadership and latent magic power (you have to have a famous name before you can even dare to dream about learning magic)

Each stat can get a value of 2 to 6. This value determines which die is used for respective skill checks.

It would be good to have at least one more player.

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Suddenly you find yourselves in the middle of a wild brawl. The loud roar of a dozen grunks fills your ears. The weakest and the slowest are already down. You know the shaman is watching you.
Many of the other grunks are bigger than you and eye you as easy pray - or dismiss you as unworthy enemies.
One of you was hitting the Rock rock with a stone when an even smaller grunk crash lands on him and both kiss the dust. You are not injured, but lying on the ground with the other one on top of you. You still have the stone in your hand. It now has a sharp edge somehow.

I'm in, will type up thing later.