Unfunny

[severalcatsdancing]

HOLY GOD WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING HERE, EM?!

[severalcatsdancing]

here's another gold mine:

Stranger: Hi there Are you a: A) Horny Guy Looking for Horny Girl B) Horny Girl Looking for Horny Guy C) Horny Guy Looking for Horny Guy D) Horny Girl Looking for Horny Girl E) Anyone who just wants to talk
You: FUCK A DUCK
You: YES
Stranger: Ah - option F?
Stranger: hahah
You: yup
You: NOW DO IT MAGGOT
You: OR SO HELP ME
You: I
You: WILL
You: snuggle
You: YOU
Stranger: But if I like it, it's not snuggle!
You: NO
You: THE
You: DUCK
You: FUCK THE DUCK
You: NOW
You: DO IT SOLDIER
You: OR YOU WILL BE HONORABLY DISCHARGED
You: COURTESY OF MY DICK
Stranger: FINE! (QUACKQUACKQUACKQUAAAAACK)
You: HARDER MAGGOT
Stranger: QUACKQUACKQUACKQUACK!!!!!!
You: MAKE ME FEEL LIKE I'M BEING snuggled
You: NOT HARD ENOUGH
Stranger: QUACK! You like that?! HUH?! QUACK LIKE A BITCH!
You: HARDER
You: NOW SING TO IT
You: AND DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
You: AND SING IN TUNE
You: GOD HELP YOU IF I FIND OUT YOU HAVEN'T FOLLOWED ORDERS SOLDIER
Stranger: THAT'S RIGHT! YOU LIKE IT YOU SLUTTY DUCK
Stranger: (SPANKS FEATHERS)
You: THERE WE GO
You: I FEEL MY ANUS BLEEDING
You: YOU'RE DOING GODS WORK, SOLDIER
You: NOW SING
Stranger: OH RUBBER DUCKY
Stranger: I LOVE RUBBER IN MY DUCKY...
Stranger: OHHH DUCKYYYY
You: YES
You: THEEEERE WE GO
You: YOU ARE NOW PROMOTED TO LIEUTENANT PRIVATEPARTS
Stranger: NICE
Stranger: YOU WERE A GOOD, NONCONSENSUAL LAY
You: GOOD WORK
You: YOU ARE NOW DISMISSED SOLDIER
You: GO BANG YOUR HOT BLOND WIFE
Stranger: SHE'S BRUNETTE AND A SHEEP
You: THAT'S NOT GOOD ENOUGH MGGOT
You: DYE HER FLEECE
You: MAKE HER BLOND
You: THEN YOU GET PROMOTED TO SERGEANT
Stranger: EITHER WAY, SHE'LL BE WHITE ALL OVER AS SOON AS I BLOW
You: MAGGOT
You: GOOD WORK
You: HIGH FIVE, SOLDIER
Stranger: (HIGH FIVES)
You: YEAH
You: NOW GET THAT BIMBO SEX-POT BROAD EWE OVER HERE
You: THEN YOU ARE DISMISSED FOR THE NIGHT
You: SOLDIER
Stranger: SIR! THANK YOU SIR! IT WAS AN HONOUR TO BE INSIDE YOU!
You: THAT'S THE WAY YOU GET PROMOTED CHAMP
You: IN THE NAVy
You: DIIIIIISMISSSED
Stranger: THANK YOU SIIIR
Your partner has disconnected.

Oh yeah baby.

Stranger: don't love my mom.
You: I do
You have disconnected.

[severalcatsdancing]

One more. Couldn't resist:

You: bowser?
Stranger: hey asl
You: male 30 mushroom kingdom
Stranger: 17 female israel
Stranger: so do u like israel?
Stranger: why do people hate israel?
You: it'sa pretty cool
You: i don'ta know whya
Stranger: cos of palestinian.?
You: ooooh
You: no koopa's hopefully
Stranger: i sort of hate israelians
Stranger: except for my family
Stranger: they are so cruel.
You: i'ma impartial to the ones i don'ta know
You: you don'ta seem bad
You: but bowser
You: ooooh bowser
Stranger: whers mushroom kingdom?
You: ...
You: actually, i hava no clue
Stranger: haha
You: how to geta there from earth
Stranger: with aeroplan
You: Don'ta think they woulda get you here
Stranger: im not a bowser
You: oh reeeeally
Stranger: i hate israel
You: only BOWSER would
You: lie
You: like that
Stranger: u better anti
Stranger: israelians
You: anda hate a whole culture
You: IT'S ALWAYS BOWSER
You: IT
Stranger: HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHA
You: IT'S ALWAYS AFUCKIN BOWSER
Stranger: IM NOT A BOWSER
Stranger: U WANNA FUCK ME?
You: Really?
You: ...
You: ...
You: ...
You: Yes.
You: peach adoesn't put out nowadays
You: i'ma sex starved italian man!
Stranger: YEAH\
Stranger: SO URE ITALIAN?
You: yes
Stranger: israel.
Stranger: i wanna masturbate
Stranger: owh.
Stranger: oooh
Stranger: give me ur email
Stranger: msn
You: Nevera thought i'd get thataa reaction froma ANYBODY
Stranger: u have facebook?
You: peach says i'm too hairy fora her
You: search for Mario Mario
You: you'lla find me
Stranger: fucku
You: no
You: you are afuckin me
You: remember?
Your partner has disconnected.

[GrafZeppelin]

Stranger: les?
You: wut
Stranger: lesbian?
You: I'm a dude
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

How rude...

[Scottsamn]

Stranger: hey, im james
You: [Unfunny is required to inform you you are now a registered hamburgler]
Stranger: huh! really
You: [Unfunny is required to inform you you are now a registered snarker]
Stranger: ..............
You: [Unfunny is required to inform you you are now a registered mute]
You: [Unfunny is required to inform you you are now a registered fingerless typer]
You: [Unfunny is required to inform you you are now a registered anti conversationalist]

----------------------------
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: asl?
Stranger: hey
You: [Unfunny is required to inform you you are now a registered creeper]
Stranger: ok wtf ever
You: [Unfunny is required to inform you you are now a registered Mexican, Canadian, and Marsion]
Stranger: im in motion
Stranger: im trippin balls!!
Stranger: the trees watchin me!
You: [Unfunny is required to inform you you are now a registered dwarf]
Stranger: the couch is gonna eat me!
You: [Unfunny is required to inform you you are now a registered manorexic]
Stranger: ur fuckin stupid
You: [Unfunny is required to inform you you are now a registered mean person]
Stranger: [Unfunny is required to inform you that your dapper]
You: [Unfunny is required to inform you you are now a registered slow wit]
Stranger: i don't give a fuck u stupid bitch
You: [Unfunny is required to inform you you are now a registered ... were not even gonna say it out loud]
Stranger: whos gives a fuck! fuck the police!
You: [Unfunny is required to inform you we have your IP and are sending a squad car. have a nice day]
Stranger: u can't do shit just because i said fuck the police... it didnt hurt anyone
Stranger: so fuck u and ur dapper douchebag games
You: [Unfunny is required to inform you we totally can do shit}
Stranger: u do shit?
Stranger: u sick fuck
You: [Unfunny is required to inform you you are now a registered door opener]
Stranger: ok watever
--------
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hey hey hey
You: hi
Stranger: whats going on
You: Eating some sharks. gotta have a good breakfast before killing ninjas.
Stranger: epic
You: u?
Stranger: wating for a fucking download
You: Your in for a long, painful horrible wait. allow me to double said wait.
You: done. wait has been doubled.
Stranger: wow thanks
Stranger: asshole
You: no problem. any other problems?
Stranger: hmmmmm i can't keep it up
You: Well now it's gone.
Stranger: FUCK
Stranger: damn you
Stranger: you would think with your powers you would solve world hunger
You: any other problems?
You: and I just did. everyone's eating weiners.
Stranger: lol

[Greenkey15]

I do this all the time. here's my most recent.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Hi!
Stranger: hi
You: M or F
You: 15 m USA
Stranger: 15f usa
You: [Unfunny is required to inform you that you are a dirty whore.]
Stranger: woahh. since when?
You: [Unfunny is required to reinforce the idea that you are a dirty whore.]
You: What?
Stranger: nice.
You: [Unfunny is required to call you a dirty whore.]
Stranger: is Unfunny telling the truth?
You: [Unfunny is required to call you a dirty whore.]
You: WTF are you talking about?
Stranger: Unfunny calling me stuff
You: [Unfunny is required to call you a dirty whore.]
You: Is it now?
Stranger: mmhm
You: [Unfunny is required to call you a dirty whore.]
Stranger: it keeps calling me a whore
You: [Unfunny is required to call you a dirty whore.]
You: Woah!
You: That's cold.
Stranger: yupp
You: [Unfunny is required to call you a dirty whore.]
Stranger: apparently it's required
You: [Unfunny is required to call you a dirty whore.]
Stranger: I'm not sure when I became a whore..
You: [Unfunny is required to call you a dirty whore.]
Stranger: hmm
You:
[Unfunny is required to inform you that when you lost your virginity to your father you became a dirty whore.]
Stranger: except I didnt
You: [Unfunny is required to call you a dirty whore.]
Stranger: well, Unfunny must have the wrong person, so Ima go
You: [Unfunny is required to apologize about calling you a dirty whore.]
Stranger: but now it's apologizing.
You: [Unfunny is required to say you are still a dirty whore.]
Stranger: i wonder of Unfunny is telling the truth, even though I never did any of those things
You: Did it say something about losing virginity to my father?
Stranger: mmhm
You: Dammit that follows me everywhere.
Stranger: hahaa
You: [Unfunny is required to call you a dirty whore.]
You: I'm really sorry.
Stranger: it's cool
You: [Unfunny is required to call you a dirty whore.]
You: Good.
Stranger: shush Unfunny
You: [Unfunny is required to call you a dirty whore.]
You: [Unfunny is required to call you a dirty whore.]
You: [Unfunny is required to call you a dirty whore.]
Stranger: lmao
You: What now?
Stranger: Unfunny should tell the truth
You: [Unfunny is required to call you a dirty whore.]
You: But what is the truth?
Stranger: well I never Los my virginity to my father, so no
You: [Unfunny is required to call you a dirty whore.]
Stranger: lost
You: [Unfunny is required to call you a dirty whore.]
You: *sigh*
Stranger: I wish Unfunny would explain to me why Ima whore
You: [Unfunny is required to call you a dirty whore.]
You: It never explains anything.
Stranger: it's mean
You: [Unfunny is required to inform you that when you lost your virginity to your father you became a dirty whore.]
Stranger: ehh, I suppose Ima go learn to be a whore
You: [Unfunny is required to say you are still a dirty whore.]
You: You mean lose your virginity to your father?
Stranger: nahh. that's weird
You: [Unfunny is required to call you a dirty whore.]
Stranger: just a stranger
You: [Unfunny is required to call you a dirty whore.]
You: Get a back alley abortion?
Stranger: adios
Stranger: why of course
You: [Unfunny is required to call you a dirty whore.]
You: good.
You: The money shall be rolling in, then.

[The Shadowscythe]

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Unfunny will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Unfunny are lying.
Stranger: i m 22male, looking for female with msn, skypee or yahoo
You: i am 23, male - and looking for some random bullshit to post onto trolling websites =P
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Unfunny will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Unfunny are lying.
Stranger: hey
You: Did you get the package?
Stranger: uhmm no
You: Oh fuck
You: Find Maurice
You: Tell him, the pig is in the poke
You: and then go to the resturant
Stranger: i just called that el nigre he just said idk
You: there isn't much time
You: FUCK
You: Maurice doesn't know?
Stranger: no
You: FUCK
Stranger: yeah so now what?
You: well, we need the fucking arse snuggling package don't we?
You: I mean, what the fucking fuck are we going to do without it?
You: we're screwed man
Stranger: idk you better figure it out though
You: I mean, seriously fucking screwed
You: why do I have to figure it out?
You: YOUR THE ONE WHO IS SUPPOSED TO HAVE THE GODDAMN PACKAGE
Stranger: you were the one that was supposed to make sure it got too me
You: and Maurice . . .
You: fuck maurice
You: get on the next plane to dubai
Stranger: well then talk to that el nigre maurice
You: we need to find one eyed abdul
Stranger: ill text him right now
You: you can't
Stranger: i did
You: you can't
Stranger: i did
You: but, you just can't
You: HE HAS AN IPHONE
Stranger: but i just did
Stranger: ok and i got a sidekick
You: you fucking what?
You: what did i tell you?
You: this could endanger the entire operation?
Stranger: idk what did you tell me
You: ring any bells
Stranger: no
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

FUCK, we never did find the package . . .

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Unfunny will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Unfunny are lying.
Stranger: 18 m aus
You: i am 23, male - and looking for some random bullshit to post onto trolling websites =P
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Unfunny will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Unfunny are lying.
Stranger: heyy
You: I wanna be, the very best
You: the best there, ever was
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Fuck? Only two lines, guess he didn't like the pokemon theme . . .

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Unfunny will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Unfunny are lying.
Stranger: hey how are you?
You: To be honest
Stranger: kewl, yah same.
You: a little tired with everyone trying to cyber with me
You: it's like, fuck sake
Stranger: Here is a pic of me http://iupload.info/files/1/IMG_0041.jpg do you think i'm hot?
You: I came here to troll man
Stranger: Crap, my roomate is being weird... if u want, go add me as a friend and send me a message here ( http://single-match.org/amanda414/ ) I got a few nudes up there and my cell
You: waaaaait
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Fucking Bots!

[aoffan23]

AHAHAHAHA

I laughed while reading that whole thing.

Also, me love you long time.

[Elmagnifico]

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Unfunny will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Unfunny are lying.
Stranger: oi
You: 'allo 'allo
Stranger: ga' day
You: 'ew from Australia?
Stranger: alright
Stranger: hola
Stranger: better?
You: Oh, I have nothing against Australians
You: I was just trying to guess the accent.
Stranger: oh
Stranger: akward
You: <.<You>.>
Stranger: 'cause i was ready to retort with "AUSTRALIANS HAVE SEXY ACCENTS!"
You: AND THEY DO
You: I SEE YOU HAVE BEEN INTRODUCED TO CRUISE CONTROL FOR COOL
Stranger: I'M GUESSING YOUR REFERING TO CAPS?
You: INDEED I AM
Stranger: IT MAKES EVERYTHING SEEM PRETTY INTENSE
You: I KNOW
Stranger: SEEING AS I AM READING THIS IN A SHOUTING VOICE
Stranger: GIVES ME 'NAM FLASHBACKS
You: REALLY?
Stranger: LOOK OUT!! CHARLIE IN THE TREES!!!!!

Stranger: MORTOR FIRE!
Stranger: TAKE COVER!
You: IT'S BRINGING BACK OMAHA FOR ME.
Stranger: MAH LEGS!!
Stranger: MAH GOD DAMN LEGS!!!!!

You: RUN FORREST, RUN!!!!!!!
Stranger: AAHHHH, WHY IS FOREST IN MY 'NAM FLASHBACKS?!
Stranger: WHO LET YOU IN THE ARMY?!

You: 'CUZ YOU'RE LUTENANT DAN, OBVIOUSLY!!!
Stranger: HOLY SHIT I AM!

You: AND I GOT IN BECAUSE OF MY BRIGHT PRETTY EYES AND BECAUSE I ALREADY HAD THE HAIRCUT
You: I THINK THAT RECRUITER WAS LOOKING AT ME FUNNY
Stranger: YOU NEED TO BE TOUGH TO SURVIVE IN VIETNAM
You: AND CHANGE YOUR SOCKS FREQUENTLY
Stranger: I RAINED FOR 3 FUCKING MONTHS STRAIGHT, I DROWNED A GOOK IN MUD
Stranger: >:{
You: I STRANGLED A CHARLIE WITH MY BOOTSTRAP AND CHARGED A MACHINEGUN NEST, UPHILL BOTH WAYS!
You: I ATE LEECHES FOR A WEEK BECAUSE WE WERE OUT OF JERKY
Stranger: I HAD TO STRANGLE 100 CHARLIES...WITH MY DICK!!!!
You: It must be incredibly long and bendy.
You: ANYWAY
Stranger: YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW HARD IT IS TO GO YOUR WHOLE DICK AROUND A VIETNAMESE GUYS NECK?!

You: I BEAT A CHARLIE TO DEATH WITH MY OWN SEVERED ARM
You: AND THEN I GOT KILLED
You: BUT THAT DIDN'T STOP ME
You: YOU DON'T NEED SILLY THINGS LIKE HEADS TO FIGHT
Stranger: I HAD TO TAKE DOWN AN ATTACK CHOPPER WITH A GOD DAMN WOODEN SPOON
You: JUST A PAIR OF BIG BRASS ONES AND AN ARM
You: AND THEN MY SERGEANT SAYS TO ME: RAMIEREZ, TAKE OUT THAT T-34 WITH THIS PAIR OF SOCKS
You: AND I DID IT
You: BECAUSE IN 'NAM, IF YOU WANTED TO SURVIVE, YOU LISTENED TO YOUR COMMANDING OFFICER
Stranger: I TOOK DOWN AN AC130 WITH AN RPG
Stranger: YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT THAT WAS?!
You: BAH, RPGS
Stranger: THOSE FUCKING THINGS don't FLY STRAIGHT AT ALL
Stranger: THEY MAY EVEN BE Bigglesworth
You: SERVES THEM RIGHT
You: HAD TO TAKE OUT A NEST OF SNIPERS WITH MY FUCKING RADIO
You: DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW BADLY YOU CAN DAMAGE A RADIO BASHING SKULLS IN WITH IT
Stranger: I HAD TO CHOP DOWN A TREE WITH MY TEETH
You: YOU GOT TO USE YOUR TEETH!?!
You: I HAD TO CHOP THREE DOWN WITH MY TOENAILS
You: AND I ONLY HAD ONE LEFT BY THAT POINT
Stranger: I HAD TO BURN DOWN A FOREST WITH MY SEAMEN
Stranger: don't ASK ME HOW I DID IT
Stranger: BUT I DID IT
You: THAT MUST HAVE BEEN PAINFUL
Stranger: YOU HAVE NO IDEA
Stranger: I WAS THE DEFINITION OF THE PHRASE "that burning sensation when you piss"
You: DON'T GET ME STARTED ON THE PISS
You: WE RAN OUT OF FLAMETHROWER FUEL ABOUT HALFWAY THROUGH OUR CAMPAIGN
You: THAT IS ALL THAT SHOULD BE SAID.
Stranger: WE TOOK SPEEDBALLS TO STAY AWAKE
Stranger: YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW EXPENSIVE IT IS TO PRACTICLY MAINLINE COCAINE AND HEROIN TO VIETNAM?!
You: I HEAR THE COLUMBIANS WERE OFFERING A BULK RATE
Stranger: THEY WEREN'T BACK IN 'NAM
Stranger: BACK IN 'NAM WE DIDN'T HAVE "BACK IN 'NAM" STORYS TO LIGHTEN THE MOOD.
You: NO, BUT ONE OF MY BUDDIES HAD "BACK IN KOREA" STORIES
You: AND A BUDDY OF HIS HAD "BACK ON OMAHA" STORIES
You: SO WE MADE DO
Stranger: BACK IN NAM I NEEDED TO WALK THROUGH NO MANS LAND TO RETRIVE MY COMANDERS CORN-PIPE
Stranger: AND I WAS DECLARED A HERO FOR IT
You: I TRIED TO RETRIEVE SOMETHING I LOST IN 'NAM
Stranger: YOUR SANITY?1
You: I PROMPTLY GOT SHOT IN THE HEAD FOR MY TROUBLE
You: DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW HARD IT IS TO PERFORM LIFE-SAVING SURGERY IN A FLOODED FIELD WHILST BEING STRAFED WITH NAPALM BY A BUNCH OF AIR-FORCE COWBOYS WHO CAN'T READ A FUCKING MAP?!?
Stranger: YES
Stranger: ALTOUGH, I HAD NO ARMS AT THE TIME
You: THEN THERE WAS THAT ONE TIME WE WERE SENT TO TAKE OUT A
You: 'KONG COMMAND POST
Stranger: BACK IN VIETNAM, WE HAD TO FIGHT ZENOMORPHS AND PREDATORS, THEY WERE ALL WORKIN WITH THE CHARLIES!!
You: AT LEAST THE TERMINATORS WERE ON OUR SIDE
Stranger: WE HAD ONE IN OUR PLATOON
Stranger: AND HE HAD ONLY ONE LEG
You: YOU GOT ONE WITH A LEG?!!
You: OURS HAD TREADS
You: AND WE HAD TO DRAG HIM THROUGH EVERY FROST-FORSAKEN RICE PADDY
You: THAT PROTON CANNON WAS A LIFESAVER, THOUGH
You: I'LL NEVER FORGET THE SIGHT OF A 'KONG PILLBOX IN FLAMES, EXPLODING, WITH TITS, AND ON FIRE.
You: AND THEN CRUMBLING INTO RADIOACTIVE DUST.
Stranger: I WAS snuggled BY 3 SUPERMUTANTS
Stranger: ...THATS IT
Stranger: I don't THINK I NEED TO GO INTO DETAIL ON THAT ONE
You: THERE ARE SOME THINGS BEST LEFT UNSAID
You: THE VAMPIRES WERE THE WORST
You: CHARLIE WOULD SHOOT THEM OUT OF MORTARS, AND YOU NEVER KNEW WHERE THEY WERE GOING TO HIT
You: BECAUSE THEY FUCKING SPARKLED
Stranger: YOU ONLY HAD VAMPIRES?! WE HAD WERE-PIRES
You: THAT 'AINT RIGHT
Stranger: FUCKING WOLVES THAT COULD TURN INTO BATS
Stranger: FUCKING TERIFYING
You: AND THEN THERE WERE THE HEADCRABS
Stranger: ALTOUGH AFTER YOU SET A CHARLIE ON FIRE WITH YOUR OWN SEAMNE, WHAT'S THERE TO BE AFRAID OF?!

You: THAT'S HOW WE LOST OUR FRANK
Stranger: don't EVEN GET ME STARTED
You: STUPID FLAMETHROWER TROOPER WENT AND TOOK A PISS UNDER A TREE
You: AND THEN BAM
Stranger: ONE OF THEM POISON HEADCRABS GET ONE OF THE WEREPIRES AND IT WAS AWFUL
You: SAND THEN THERE WERE THE FAST HEADCRAB SUPER MUTANTS
You: THAT MADE ME BROWN MY PANTS, I CAN TELL YOU
You: ANYWAY, I HAVE SOME RELATIVES TO YELL AT
You: STUPID KIDS CAN'T LET A GUY CHAT TEN MINUTES WITHOUT NEEDING SOMETHING
You: IT WAS FUN EXCHANGING 'NAM STORIES
Stranger: BACK AT CHA!
You: LATER!

[RunsWithLegos]

you are the end boss of the universe

[Warhead]

@Elmagnifico: I see he only makes an excuse to leave after you start talking about head crabs, which he doesn't seem to get the reference for. I suspect that his part in this chat was his actual real life Viet-Nam stories. You should have given this dude our site address.

[Tzan]

Stranger: BACK IN 'NAM WE DIDN'T HAVE "BACK IN 'NAM" STORYS TO LIGHTEN THE MOOD.

[Lt. Krus]

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Unfunny will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Unfunny are lying.
You: hey
Stranger: jigglypuff.
You: Charzard.
You: I use firestorm
Stranger: YOU LEGEND.
You: you lose 30hp
You: I swap out charzard for mewtwo.
You: I use physcic.
Stranger: it charizard, btw. :L
You: you get confused.
You: Jiggleypuff hurts itself! -20ph
You: Jiggleypuff fainted!
Stranger: your cool man.
You: Choose a different pokemon?
Stranger: but
Stranger: machoke.
Stranger: fighting!
You: Machoke uses karate chop! mewtwo loses 20 hp!
You: Mewtwo uses physcic!
You: Macjoke gets confused!
You: *Machoke
You: Machoke hurts itself in confusion!
You: -30hp
You: I swap out mewtwo for Bulbasaur
You: Bulbasaur uses squirt!
You: machoke loses 20hp
You: Machoke uses high kick!
You: Its super effective!
You: Bulbasaur fainted!
You: Choose a different pokemon?
You: I choose Mew!
You: Mew uses teleport!
You: Darn!
You: You lost him!
You: Ash says, "Mother fucking puss"
You: "He ran."
You: "well, Im goin to the strip club."
You: "Misty you fucking whor make me a sanwhich!"
You: "and brock you fucking douche"
You: "get a pair of eyes for christs sake!"
You: Brock says, "But those fucking japanese can't draw for shit!"
You: Misty says, "here is you sanwhich!"
You: *your
You: Ash says, "You fucking dumbass! Pika-shit could get it rite! Ima llergic to mayo and you know it you fuck!"
You: Misty cries, running back to the kitchen.
You: Oh no! It' team rocket looking for a rap battle!
You: Ash says" Bring it wiggers!"
You: "Im 1/64 black!"
You: Team rocket raps, " Yo motha fucka thers a price to pay,
You: for evadin our perswadin little cat-pussay!"
You: "Me-ow thats me, Ima motha fuckin cat
You: Ill run up you ass lik a motha fucking bat!"
You: Ash raps back, " All rite you little pussyies im striegh from P-Town
You: Iand I rule like a king wit his crown
You: Bitch!"
You: "Oh shit whats that is that a fucking rat? Oh never mind thats your little pussy fat-ass,
pokemon,
he can't fight for shit,
he be masterbatin his little dick,
all day while and your gang of hoes,
go fucking up the pokemon for the shows
You: "OOOHHHHHHH" says the crowd
You: Pikachu replies like a el nigre, " All rite, fine, you can can call me a flama, but you little motha fuckas can't catch me, can ya?"
You: "Hoe."
You: Meowth steps up and says, " Aight aight aight you little fuckin wigga, can can run motha fucka can I got a trigga, I bust a cap in your fuckin ass, and youll be runnin around like a little piece of shat, bitch."
You: What is this? Oh! Its Professor Oak! What does he have to say?
You: "All rite all rite you little fuckin shits, stop foolin around, woth your fuckin dicks. I came here cause im the king with the crown, ha ha motha fuckas you can't stop me now, Ill call up all my homies and beat your fat asses, youll be runnin back to japan with your passport passes."
You: Oh no! You just got cholled by proffessor Oak!
You: *schooled
You: Professor Oak hand you an item! What is it?
You: Its a used condum!
You: "Your mom wanted me to give this to you, bitch."
You: Says oak.
You: P. Oak bitch slaps Misty! But she is your hoe! You can't let him do that!
You: You butt snuggle P. Oak!
You: You win 1556673 dollars!
You: *WARNING*
You: *YOU ARE RUNNING LOW ON BATTER POWER*
You: *battery
You: You swap batteries for your gameboy.
You: You load a saved game.
You: Ash says,"WHOS THE BITCH NOW, OAK!?"
You: But what!?
You: Its Gary!
You: He callenges you and P. Oak to a three way!
You: *CHALLENGES
You: You put on a condum.
You: Its was P. Oaks.
You: You die of AIDS

BEST
CONVERSATION
EVER

[jmatthew]

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Unfunny will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Unfunny are lying.
You: hey
Stranger: jigglypuff.
You: Charzard.
[...]
You: You die of AIDS

BEST
CONVERSATION
EVER

That's not really so much of a conversation as it is a long string of you putting words in the mouths of characters and simply making them say fuck-words over and over again, now is it? I was hoping for some humorous response from the stranger at the end of it, but I was sorely disappointed. And then you go and laud your own ramblings as the "best conversation ever" when there is really no two-way conversation going on at all, other than a small smidge at the very beginning. The part of this "conversation" that actually can be defined by that word is far from the best, in my humble opinion.

Please don't be booty bothered; I am simply trying to help you choose your how you label things more wisely in the future.

[Silent-sigfig]

booty bothered IS COOL TOO.