Metal Cultists- Heavyfishcannon

Ozzy runs forward towards the APC, but doesn't quite make it. He also tries to pull out his shotgun, but seems to have left it at home.


The Brikthuloid abomination and the witches swarm Tommy Alfredo. The Brikthuloid abomination eats one of the chicken grenades. It explodes with deliciousness inside of him, but does no real damage.

One witch strikes Tommy with her scythe(-1hp). He is now poisoned, and must find an antidote.

The other witch attempts to finish Tommy off, but misses and kills the Brikthuloid abomination instead.

The remaining cultist jumps in the car.
Kevin- MGB519


Kevin picks up the rocket launcher and shoots the Corrupted Spacemen fighter, but doesn't do enough damage.
Police- Lawmaster

Jenkins decides that now is a good time to remind everyone of their second amendment rights: "what we need here is well regulated militia, so I'm gonna deputize y'all and give y'all some guns. Kill anyone who doesn't submit to my authoritah."


Jenkins gives a shotgun to Ozzy, and one to the Exterminator, who dual wields it with his minigun because he's the exterminator.

Jenkins shoots, John Woo, who survives due to a very high defense roll.
The Exterminator- Zupponn

The Exterminator opens fire on John Woo, the witch and Tommy Alfredo. He manages to wound Tommy (-1hp).
The Most Interesting Man in the World- Alex

Having finished his scotch, the Dos Briquis guy walks out and surveys the situation.




Noticing that one witch is distracted, he runs up and beheads her.
Civilians- NPC

This beachgoer cuts into Quetzalcoatl (-1hp).

The surfer girl wounds him for another hp.


This civilian tries to attack Briktezuma, but his attack is parried. He's subsequently killed by the counterattack.


Tommy Alfredo tries to attack the witch, but just ends up falling face-first into a pot.
The Four Horsemen of the Brikpocalypse- NPC




Conquest decides to conquer Comrade Communism by crushing his cranium. "You may defeat me," Comrade Communism says, "but you will never defeat the power of the proletariat!"

Warhead tries to kill one of the corrupted spacemen leaders, but misses.

Death also fails to hit the Corrupted Spaceman.

Plague hits Mummhotep, but fails to do enough damage to overcome Mummhotep's defense.
Xaman Ek- NPC


Xaman Ek decides now is a good time to grab the gold and peace out.
The Master- DeltaV



The Master jumps down and attacks the nearby survivalist. The sword/staff/dropkick combo causes the survivalist marksman to lose 1hp.
The B.A. Team- Kalvinator


Mark Manson headshots one of the soldiers through the wreckage.



John Woo lunges forward and grabs his swords. He attacks the Exterminator, but can't seem to overcome the Exterminator's defense roll.

Buzz Saw kills the APC operator.

He then jumps in, shuts the hatch and jacks the APC. He can't quite seem to figure out the weapon controls just yet though.

Tommy Gunn shoots the remaining soldier, but doesn't do enough damage to kill him.

Max Damage fires a rocket at the crates of explosives in the back of the van.


The resulting explosion destroys the van and the two sports cars, kills Mummhotep, Plague and his horse, and Duke Ossum. It also causes Max Damage, Mark Manson and one of the Corrupted Spacemen leaders to lose 1hp.
Army-SVGK

The remaining soldier fires a grenade at Tommy Gunn and Mark Manson, but fails to do enough damage to kill either.
Metal Fucking Santa- Brikboyz

Santa fires a rocket at the Corrupted Spacemen fighter and destroys it.

It crashes into the APC (-2 structure points), completely knocking off the turret and the remaining grenade launcher.

One of the fighter wings hits Ozzy and Jenkins, but both are unhurt.

The other wing hits Max Damage and Mark Manson, cutting Mark in half as a result.

The elf grabs the flagpole with a mummy impaled on it and stabs the other mummy, who survives due to a very high defense roll.
Corrupted Spacemen- 501st Cadians

One of the Corrupted Spaceman leaders tries to corrupt Sgt Cortex, but fails. He then stabs him with his nova claymore (-1hp)



The other Corrupted Spaceman leader sacrifices 1hp in order to raise some minions.
Azteks-Runswithlegos

Briktezuma beats down another civilian.


The Azmech throws a dead Corrupted Spaceman at the Corrupted Spaceman leader, who gets redshirted by one of his new minions.


The Azmech then throws one of its retrieved OT disks at the Corrupted Spaceman leader, who survives due to an insane defense roll.
Survivalists- Keldoclock


"The Brikpocalypse ain't got nothing on me!" the Mad Max lookalike shouts. He unloads everything his gun has on the enemies in front of him, killing the Corrupted Spaceman leader, a minion, and Warhead's and Death's horses. Warhead also takes 2hp of damage.

The lifeguard tries to burninate Warhead but this doesn't seem to be very effective, maybe because his skull is already on fire.

The survivalist veteran launches a pair of grenades, wounding Death (-1hp) and re-killing the corrupted undead Duke Ossum and gorilla suit guy.

MacGearver attacks the corrupted undead tennis valkyrie, but can't defeat her armor roll.

"You're a worthy opponent," the survivalist marksman tells the Master, "but right now we should focus on defeating the Corrupted Spacemen." The Master agrees.

The marksman then shoots the undead corrupted Aztek, but doesn't do enough damage to kill him.
Quetzalcoatl- Pwnerade


Quetzalcoatl hits the surfer girl with his tail. She gets knocked back and disrupted, but is otherwise unharmed.
Mummies- Darkpaladin

The half mummy tries to attack to elf, but doesn't do enough damage. The other mummy just fails around helplessly.
Sgt. Cortex- Alphafalcon541


Sgt Cortex calls in the Mysterious Sci-fi trooper for backup, who warps into the warehouse. The Mysterious Sci-fi trooper shoots at the Corrupted Spaceman, but misses and hits Sgt. Cortex instead, who is unharmed. Sgt. Cortex attempts to melee with his plasma rifles, but doesn't do enough damage for them to be effective.
Psy+the Band- Silverdream

Eddie gets back on stage to play some death metal. He cranks the amp all the way to 11 and starts to shred.

The amps can't contain the power of
Faction Eliminated- Psy+the Band
The Most Interesting Man in the World: 6
Psy+the Band (Eliminated): 3 (Self Inflicted)
Civilians: 13+2 (Self Inflicted)+ 1 cow
Police: 6+3 (Self Inflicted)
Looters (eliminated from map): 10
Azteks: 17+2(Self Inflicted)+1 Giant Fish
Mummies: 11 + 1(Self Inflicted)
B.A. Team: 14+1 Killer Rabbit+1 horse
Survivalists: 15+2 horses
Major Patriotism (Corrupted and Eliminated): 4
Metal Fucking Santa: 5+1 fighter
Kevin McCanister: 5
The Exterminator: 2
Zombies (Eliminated): 1+1 (Self Inflicted)
The Master:0
U.S. Army: 2+1 pterodactyl+1 tiger-man+1 blood dragon
Corrupted Spacemen: 10+10 corruptions
Xaman Ek: 0
Quetzalcoatl: 1
The Killer Rabbit (eliminated): 11
Metal Cultists: 1+1 Brikthuloid abomination (self-inflicted)
Mad Scientist+Lab Creations (eliminated): 3
Four Horsemen: 2
Sgt. Cortex and Duke Ossum: 2
Overviews:



Send in orders for turn 8!