The planets are aligned...
The Saturnalia Spirit descends from a distant dimension and works a powerful enchantment, curbing all violent impulses in Legopia. Even if only for one day, the land will finally know peace.
This is freaking unacceptable.
Seven heroes shrug off their kindness-induced stupor to fight back.
The God of War has finally escaped from Hades (again), and no extradimensional horror will stop him taking his aggression out.
Potch the Adventurer
A legendary treasure hunter, also known as "The man with the magic gun". This wouldn't be the first monstrosity from beyond the veil he's dealt with, though it may be the strongest.
He's ready to return awesome to Legopia. With lasers.
A legendary warrior from the east, renowned for his magnificent beard and ability to horribly murder people from beyond the grave.
Founder of the Warrior Princesses, highest of the Legopian Alliance's nobility, and generally very scary woman.
"This is not the way. Kindness will
come to Legopia, but it won't be by these brutish means."
"What the hell is this crap!?"
At the Sprit's left hand stands Santa Claus the time-traveling archmage.
Six of the heroes prepare to march on the newly-formed Sacred Peak. Demonic Tinkerbell flanks (And probably wouldn't have worked with bad Mage if she knew about it beforehand).
Turn 1: Heroes of Legopia
The heroes take a ramp up to the first tier.
Turn 1: Forces of Saturnalia
The Saturnalia Spirit conjures three Lesser Bulb Orbs and two Energy Crystals to power them. Santa begins a summoning spell.
Turn 2: Heroes of Legopia
Captain Awesome destroys a Bulb Orb. The heroes are faced with a stark wall, and it will be a long climb. Kratos climbs on a nearby Festive Log.
Turn 2: Forces of Saturnalia
A Bulb Orb sends a laser toward Demonic Tinkerbell, who deflects it.
Kratos is less lucky. He's knocked off the Festive Log, but lives.
Santa summons a Celestial Butterfly to bear him into battle.
The Spirit summons two Vampire Angels to take over summoning duty.
Turn 3: Heroes of Legopia
Demonic Tinkerbell swallows her pride and sprinkles some pixie dust on her allies. Now they can reach the next tier.
Guan Yu blade-rushes a Bulb Orb, destroying it.
Arturia and Kratos accomplish significantly less.
Captain Awesome aims a devastating shot at the Flower Crystal's weak point.
The explosion blasts him and bad Mage off the tier.
Captain Awesome's one-liner of the day: "Put that in your stocking and smoke it!"
Turn 3: Forces of Saturnalia
The Vampire Angels summon a Greater Bulb Orb and Phoenix.
Arturia and Kratos are killed by the Saturnalia Spirit's laser-eyes.
Santa hurls a Bulb Orb at Guan Yu, who knocks it away.
Turn 4: Heroes of Legopia
A shadowy figure slips through the trees...
Kurokage the Hang Glider Ninja
Assassinates people more-or-less at random, but has taken on a great many contracts from the Legopian Alliance. His motives are as mysterious as his choice of transportation.
Kurokage slays the Celestial Butterfly and forces Santa to earth.
His luck doesn't improve much upon hitting the ground.
Santa has outlived his usefulness. The Saturnalia Spirit detonates a nearby Bulb Orb. Potch narrowly escapes the blast; Santa Claus is slain.
bad Mage grants Captain Awesome and herself increased leg-strength and leaps back into the fray.
Turn 4: Forces of Saturnalia
A Bulb Orb blasts Guan Yu to the ground. bad Mage is barely able to save him.
The Greater Bulb Orb rushes Demonic Tinkerbell, who dives for cover.
The Vampire Angels summon another three
Lesser Bulb Orbs.
Turn 5: Heroes of Legopia
Snorlax, God of Death is annoyed. I mean, geez, do those angels ever stop
Snorlax scrawls their names in his Death Note. They spontaneously combust.
Guan Yu takes revenge on the Bulb Orb that nearly killed him.
Demonic Tinkerbell shoves the Greater Bulb Orb off a cliff and fires a bit of lightning at the Phoenix.
Potch destroys the three new Bulb Orbs with a grenade from his gun (magic, remember).
bad Mage charms the Phoenix into servitude before Demonic Tinkerbell can kill it.
Turn 5: Forces of Saturnalia
The Spirit hurls a Greater Bulb Orb Grenade at the heroes.
Another shadowy figure leaps in front of it.
A master assassin working for the Connected Bricks of Legopia. Specializes in surviving absurdly powerful attacks.
Naturally, he's completely unscathed.
With all of Her minions defeated, the heroes get ready for a final attack on the Saturnalia Spirit.
The Spirit eyebeams Demonic Tinkerbell, bad Mage and Guan Yu to death while they pose.
Captain Awesome fires a shot off to distract the Spirit.
The Saturnalia Spirit is slain, and violence returned to Legopia.
Potch the Adventurer
Kurokage the Hang Glider Ninja
The Nth Legopian War:
Battle 1: Battle of the Non-Descript Plains
Battle 2: Battle of the Unnecessary Wall
Battle 3: Outbreak at Ribannald
Filler 1: Capture the Princess
Filler 2: Battle for Ascention
Filler 3: Legopia versus the Saturnalia Spirit
-Special thanks to my brother, who served as a tactical advisor and minifig-poser (and created Neenja, but you probably already know that).
-The ultimate attack displayed for the endgame was a convenient replacement for "everyone attacks the giant, unarmored statue one-by-one". The result would have almost definitely been about the same.
-That first picture of the vampire angels was entirely un-doctored. I suppose the red is supposed to be an open mouth, but it's way too low. We literally hang undead bloodsuckers on our tree every year.
-Me and my brother forgot a lot of the rules for supernatural effects, and summoning with them just isn't practical. As a result, a lot of the effects were caused either by a heroic feat or the rule of "She's a giant Saturnalia goddess, she can do what she wants"
-The ninjas, being ninjas, were considered "on standby" when the match began. They could be placed anywhere at any point in the game.
-Snorlax become the God of Death last time around
. His laid-back benevolence makes him perfect for the job.
-This was our most spur-of-the-moment battle to date. It was planned at about 11:30 PM on Saturnalia Eve, and ended at 2:30 AM Saturnalia Day.