Hand in Glove

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Hand in Glove

Postby Silverdream » Tue Jun 17, 2014 8:04 pm

Draize Magical Gymnasium, Zauberwald, Bavarian Frontier Worlds

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Gunter: (Soliloquy) Something important happened here. The rest of the colonies on this planet were untouched by whatever struck here, and whoever did it was able to get past the Bavarian Ships guarding it.

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Gunter: By the tendrils of Azathoth...

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Gunter: (Soliloquy) These are the charred ABS remains of the Draize Tower. I don't see too many bodies among the rubble.

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Gunter: (Soliloquy) Ah, the first clue.

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Gunter: (Soliloquy) The eagle on this cap carries a Swatstika. The symbol of the Space Piltogg SS.

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Gunter: (Soliloquy) And what's more, a rifle in a magical gymnasium. Rifles and guns in magic schools are usually reserved for Kindergarten.

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Gunter: (Soliloquy) A modified Sturmgewehr, similiar to the ones used by the Bavarian Reuzenmacht. Possibly the creation of another Germanic civilization, such as the Space Nazis.

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Gunter: (Soliloquy) This curved glass looks like the residue of pwny magic. The lack of glitter suggests that it wasn't a crystal pwny. The lack of sparkles means that their was only likely one horny pwny. The ash in this building could be the result of a Piltogg bomb, however it's just as likely the result of a few kamikaze pwnies. Likewise, the crushed ribs on the skeletons could either be from hoof kicks, being crushed by the building or the result of close combat with an angry Piltogg.

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Gunter: (Soliloquy) A skeleton phased inside a wall? This has to be cruel pwny magic. I better report this to the Magician's Alliance as well as the Kaiserin herself.

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Gunter waves his black shovel in an arc, slowly while focusing his magic powers.

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A black gate opens up, but Gunter senses movement from within.

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Vanderheim: Hello Gunter, old friend. Nice to see yah. We thought we'd investigate the wreckage, but it looks like you beat us to it.

Gunter: We?

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Vanderheim: Just a few friends. I'm sure you remember Sergeant Nicolas Engel from the Magic Police and Panty Anarchie.

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Sackhead: Don't forget me, I owe you one after that card game.

Gunter: Vanderheim, as a high ranking mage, you shouldn't play poker with the mafia.

Vanderheim: That's why we played Magic the Gathering instead. Sackhead had never played before, so I lent him an extra deck. Anyways, any idea what happened here?

Gunter: Looks like the Space Nazis and Pwnies were involved. It seems they took a lot of the bodies away, as few are still left. It also looks like they tried to remove evidence, but I still found plenty. I'm thinking they may have been kidnapped for ransom, or possibly because the Space Nazis wanted German magic users to indoctrinate. I have no clue what the pwnies were doing here. My first thought is that they came to help defend the Gymnasium, but that doesn't explain the lack of pwny corpses.
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Re: Hand in Glove

Postby Zupponn » Tue Jun 17, 2014 8:58 pm

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Re: Hand in Glove

Postby Silverdream » Tue Jun 24, 2014 11:03 pm

Grand Consortium, Otherworlds

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Gunter: The thing I worry about most is if the pwnies or Space Nazis had access to our magic travel. With one captured instructor or principal, the Grand Consortium itself could become under siege.

Sgt. Nicolas Engel: Neither force would be strong or stupid enough to enter a dimension we have almost full control of. Some of the most powerful mages in all of Bavaria reside here, and more recently the Krakow Union.

Gunter: You underestimate the Nazis and their allies. The Trattorians may be weak in leadership, but their ability to collect magical beings and artifakts is truly astounding. The Scythians have no shortage of men or tek to pull in any engagement and the Praetorians have giant tyrannosaurus mechs. The Grand Consortium will need to be reinforced by the Bavarian Reuzenmacht.

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Gunter: Verdammt. Cultists and their sacrifices are always clogging up the walkways. Looks like we'll have to go another way.

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Gunter raised his hand and a small walkway of ebonite grew from the beige void. The eucharist screamed in pain as minutes of his life were turned into an element.

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Vanderheim: Looks like a fresh one, his voice hasn't become too hoarse yet.

The eucharist, a barbarian from a younger planet struggled against the ebonite rope, but it was no use. The angrier he got, the more strongly he was bound. His own brute strength was being used against him.
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mgb519 wrote:Seriously, you are now the first ever forum superhero.


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Re: Hand in Glove

Postby Quantumsurfer » Tue Jun 24, 2014 11:15 pm

Brutal.
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Re: Hand in Glove

Postby Zahru II » Wed Jun 25, 2014 2:06 am

Ebonite eh?

That reminds me I should really get back to my content once the renovation of my room gets done.

Also that peeking Overwatch is truly the master stealth.
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Re: Hand in Glove

Postby Silverdream » Wed Jun 25, 2014 6:17 pm

Zahru II wrote:Ebonite eh?

That reminds me I should really get back to my content once the renovation of my room gets done.

Also that peeking Overwatch is truly the master stealth.


Yeah, I was thinking that Bavarian mages would be leagues ahead of the Falx in terms of magic, and have ways of generating ABS from a minifig's life force.

Anyways,

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??? Overwatch-senpai, what are you doing uguu?

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Overwatch: I'm watching to see if they're talking about me. Who are you?

???: I'm your cyute wittle sistew, nyaa :3

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???: Oh, aniki, it's so breezy up hewe. I hope you don't look up my skiwt.

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???: You can see my panties.

Overwatch: Not interested.

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??? What if I was a cute little girl? Would you listen to what I have to say?

Overwatch: No. I don't listen to other Quantum Surfers anymore.

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??? What if I had dreadlocks?

Overwatch: Hmm. No.

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??? Would you listen to your waifu if she gave you weed?

Overwatch: You're not my waifu.

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??? What about booze, Hanako?

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Overwatch: Listen bitch, if you don't back off I'll kill you.

??? Ooo, how scary. I haven't had a fight in eons. Let's hope this dimension is stable enough.
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mgb519 wrote:Seriously, you are now the first ever forum superhero.


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Re: Hand in Glove

Postby Zupponn » Thu Jun 26, 2014 2:06 pm

I looked up the skirt.
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Re: Hand in Glove

Postby Silverdream » Thu Jun 26, 2014 9:29 pm

One of the more fitting songs for this.

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The battle between the Quantum Surfers happens in attoseconds. Time appears to stand still as the two wills clash.

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??? *Giggles* Is this the extent of the fearsome Hanako? All you can imagine is a few guns?

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??? Oh, so you won't die the same way twice. Looks like you're only a little less pathetic.

Overwatch: Shut up, bitch!

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The apparition of Levi Zipps moves fast, but Overwatch's rage and determination gives him the edge.

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???: Haha, it looks like you've learned some skills since Quantum Kindergarten.

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???: I don't even want to bother with these stupid toys.

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Overwatch continues to blast the apparition with his anal disruptor.

???: My, my, you really can't contain your hatred and fear can you?

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Overwatch: I can handle it like a dick!

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???: Oh really? I can sense your innermost fears easily, Hanako. Hanako the burn queen.

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Overwatch: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

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Overwatch: Oh god.

??? I can't believe this is your biggest fear. You're hopeless inside and out.

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Quantum Teacher: Alright class, this is Hanako. She won't change her form, and she's really self conscious about her burns. Anyone who makes fun of her will face DISCIPLINARY ACTION.

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Clone Boy: Hey, why doesn't she just change her form? Even a baby can do that.

Dog: Yeah, Hanako the fire baby. She's worse than horse girl.

Horse Girl: Hey.

Overwatch: But I'm wearing clothes, you can't see my burns. They're all covered up.

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Princess: I do proclaim her to be Hanako the burn Queen.

Overwatch: I swear, if you guys don't stop I'll kill all of you.

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Chanting Children: Hanako the burn Queen. Hanako the burn Queen.

Overwatch: SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP!

Chanting Children: HANAKO THE BURN QUEEN! HANAKO THE BURN QUEEN! HANAKO THE BURN QUEEN!

The louder Overwatch yelled, the louder the children chanted. Her voice was drowned out, and eventually she began to cry.

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Dragon: Hanakoooo the buuuuuurn Queeeeen.

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The children began to shout louder and louder, and the dimension began to spin. Overwatch was frozen in fear and sadness, and she stood humiliated in the crowd.

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Overwatch: *crying* Okay, I give up. Just make them stop!

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??? Oh, but I've just started. I can't let my imagination go to waste.

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Fire enveloped Overwatch, and she began to scream. Her armour was only kindling to the flame, and she felt the pain beyond it's heat.

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Dragon: Hey wait guys, I want to burn Hanako too. I can do a grand finale.

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Suddenly, a beam of light blasted the dragon before he could breath fire.

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Dragon: AAAAHHHHH!!!

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??? What the hell? Overwatch, do you honestly think you c-

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???: Now u r nokd off ur high horsie. prepare to get rekt bitch.

???: Hey, that's my name. Who the hell do you think you are?

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Silvadream: I'm Silvadream, and get ur filthy paws off of him u dam dirty ape.
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Spoiler: show
mgb519 wrote:Seriously, you are now the first ever forum superhero.


Colette wrote:I hereby acknowledge Silverdream as the one and only forum troll as agreed in the bet.


Quantumsurfer wrote:No, I have 2 silver.
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Re: Hand in Glove

Postby Theblackdog » Thu Jun 26, 2014 10:13 pm

:fu:
Just one random act of violence can brighten your day. Especially if it involves explosives.

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Re: Hand in Glove

Postby Quantumsurfer » Thu Jun 26, 2014 10:55 pm

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Holy shit, now, that's comedy.
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Re: Hand in Glove

Postby Vami IV » Fri Jun 27, 2014 11:14 am

Great story and Movie references, Silvy. I look forward to more of this.
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Re: Hand in Glove

Postby Colette » Fri Jun 27, 2014 11:19 am

When you can make Overwatch and Silvadream into tragic/heroic characters...
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Re: Hand in Glove

Postby Zupponn » Fri Jun 27, 2014 12:12 pm

After their victory, I'm expecting a hot and steamy makeout session.
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Re: Hand in Glove

Postby The Shadowscythe » Fri Jun 27, 2014 12:32 pm

Zupponn wrote:After their victory, I'm expecting a hot and steamy makeout session.


This, I'm placing my votes on this.

I don't even care if I can't or don't have any votes, I'm voting for it anyway.

Also. I totally looked up that skirt.
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-- WARNINK -- LINK BELOW IZ KNOWN TO CAUZE HEMMORAGE --
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I WARNED YOU, DIDN'T I WARN YOU?! BLAME RAYHAWK DAMNIT.
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Re: Hand in Glove

Postby Overwatch_Elite » Fri Jun 27, 2014 1:17 pm

It can only go up from here
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