Taking up my pen again in a manner of speaking......

You know, whatever

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Postby White Nun » Mon Aug 22, 2011 5:11 pm

I can tell, - I'm starting to get into writing mode again. When I used to get like this before it was like an addiction. I had all these words inside me that I had to get down on the page and too bad about anything else that was trying to claim my attention. (work, study, marriage partners, food, sleep.......) Fortunately having now aquired the discipline of contemplative prayer/meditation as a part of my daily routine the urge to write doesn't seem to be becoming the huge antisocial force that it used to.
I don't smoke cigarettes anymore, but when I used to write before I would fill ashtrays and barely notice that I was doing it. And this was with hand rolled ciggies too! I would roll a ciggie and light up barely without pausing at the keyboard; - all my attention was on the creative process.

I'm not even working on any Lego stuff at the moment. I have some new design sheets and a whole lot of brand new bricks that have just been delivered and it's.... meh.... I know I will get back to it, it's just that all my creativity is going into the book with nothing left over for MOCs

It's difficult to be writing a chapter with the subject of necromancy at its heart and not start thinking of the paintings of H.R. Giger. His images are almost a fit for some of what I'm visualising in my head only what I'm writing about is magical organic necromancy and not the bio-mechanical necromancy that Giger does such a disturbingly precise job of portraying. It's a pity I can't draw for toffee or I'd be attempting to sketch some of the 1st chapter images in my head so you could see what I mean.
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Postby Silverdream » Mon Aug 22, 2011 8:11 pm

If you're going with Gigerian imagery, are there going to be phalluses and ovules?
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Postby White Nun » Tue Aug 23, 2011 7:01 am

Silverdream wrote:If you're going with Gigerian imagery, are there going to be phalluses and ovules?


Na, you're talking to a chastity empowers type of girl remember :wink:

I said Giger was almost a fit for what I had in mind, not an exact match.
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Postby White Nun » Tue Aug 23, 2011 10:25 pm

Ok this is interesting, I've just stumbled on a website called Smashwords.com that enables folk to publish their book manuscripts on-line. I've found others too, but some of those were a bit too 'much fine gold will be yours' for my liking. Smashwords looks like being a plain and simple way to get oneself published and I like that. What you see is what you get is very much what I'm about whereas sites that talk about obtaining sudden wealth apparently for free just makes me want to knee somebody in the nadgers.

I have quite a few of my old manuscripts still so perhaps it's time to blow the dust off them and get them up on-line. One or two of my manuscripts were ones where folk would constantly grip me by the arms after reading them and shout at me, 'Oh my god you have to get this published!!!' So perhaps I finally will get around to it afterall.
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Postby Silverdream » Wed Aug 24, 2011 11:43 am

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I think this is relevant to what you are going for in terms of gigerian imagery.
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Postby White Nun » Wed Aug 24, 2011 5:20 pm

Yes you are quite right Silver; - that is one of the images that is so close to being a perfect fit for what I'm doing it's not funny. One of the important deities in 'The Book of Ashes' is known only as 'She Who Is' and whenever I write her name that's pretty much the Giger image that comes to mind.

The image that reminds me most of all of Eiolynn (my tormented central character) is this one........

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Postby Ex-Lep » Wed Aug 24, 2011 10:30 pm

this sounds interesting.

you get this or others published, and i will buy them or download if free.
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Postby White Nun » Thu Aug 25, 2011 8:31 am

The first draft of Chapter One is complete and posted to a blog page.

You may read it here......... http://thebookofashes.blogspot.com/2011/08/book-of-ashes-chapter-one.html

The blog software isn't the most ideal for dropping a word processed document into, but it will do for the purpose for the present time.
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Postby White Nun » Thu Aug 25, 2011 7:46 pm

The second chapter will open in the 'present time' of the story around three hundred years after the end of the first chapter. I'm not going to hand out any spoilers, but I do know exactly what did happen after the end of the first chapter and I'll reveal those events little by little over the course of the second chapter. I'm very much a 'let the story tell the story' kind of writer and I don't tend to get into pages and pages of descriptions and explainations given by a magic off stage narrator who knows everything.

For those waiting for more action to happen you'll get plenty of that in the second chapter.
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Postby Zupponn » Thu Aug 25, 2011 8:27 pm

I am having difficulty following the first chapter, mainly because the sentence flow feels off to me. In some parts it feels that you are afraid of writing shorter sentences, while in others the sentences are in need of editing, for instance:

Like a flickering spark the great spell making that had taken so much to bring to birth awoke.

She near gave me the golden circlet off her brow with her own pale cold hands as well only Mannock the Priest would have none of it and dashed it to the ground.

For me, these problems are too much trouble to really understand what's going on and I couldn't work my way through the piece, so I'm not sure if later on you corrected these problems or not. You are trying to do a lot here and I can see that, but it just feels off.
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Postby White Nun » Thu Aug 25, 2011 10:58 pm

It's because I write in 'voice' following grammatical structures that aren't necessarily modern English.

The 'King' in the first chapter is writing in his journal after the fact . And Eiolynn and Lissel & co are in the present moment of the events as they happen.

I'm not so far away from most of the classic fantasy authors in my approach to writing. :)

The next chapter might suit you better as the 'voices' aren't so retro-styled in their form.

You would've hated my last big novel, - the central character spoke a form of French patois and I didn't bother much with a glossary. As anybody reading it got deeper into the book it became pretty obvious as to what she was saying.
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Postby Zupponn » Thu Aug 25, 2011 11:58 pm

Well, if that's what you're going for, then I guess you're succeeding. :)
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Postby White Nun » Fri Aug 26, 2011 12:05 am

Zupponn wrote:Well, if that's what you're going for, then I guess you're succeeding. :)


Thanks for your criticism though, it's always good to get feedback.
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Postby stubby » Fri Aug 26, 2011 3:41 pm

Some of the better advice I got from my design profs was: if you're going to do something wrong, make sure people know it's on purpose. The worst thing you can do is make something just off enough that people think you lack skill, but not off enough that they know you're doing it for effect.

So the writing's a little clunky, and you'll want to come back and edit the opening paragraphs later when you've had a couple more chapters to really establish what you want to accomplish with the writing style. But that's second-draft stuff, you don't want to start that kind of polishing work until you've finished a whole draft and have the overall shape of the thing fleshed out in working text.
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Postby White Nun » Fri Aug 26, 2011 5:13 pm

Thanks Stubby. Yes you're completely right; - this is all first draft stuff and I won't really settle in to do any serious editing and polishing until I've got the whole thing basically written down and complete.
Getting 'voice' right as well as any archaic grammar forms done and dusted in a consistent way can turn into a shipwreck when attempted too early. Just getting it all down for a start can be enough.

Yes, some of it is clunky. The separation between the past tense journal and the present tense action is rough about the edges. Things going on in the tomb need a bit more explanation not mention better description of the tomb itself. This will have to be balanced though because I don't end up telling the whole story in the first chapter and killing off any sense of mystery.
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