Stranger: is that you?
Stranger: where are you
You: I TOLD YOU ALREADY! I'm at ryan's
Stranger: you were supposed to call
You: stop being a bitch! i told you i'd call later
You: you're making me look SO uncool right now mom
You: girls are watching!
Stranger: its time to come home
Stranger: are you with paige?
You: awwwww mommmmm
You: yeah, why?
Stranger: you know what i told you about her
You: ok, but she does NOT have the clap. i asked her
Stranger: she is a lying hussy
You: she can see what you're saying!!
Stranger: did she make you smoke drugs?
You: mom i told you already
You: i won't give in to peer pressure
You: okay, fine
Stranger: ARE YOU SMOKING DRUG JASON!!!
You: i may have smoked one or two pots!
You: GODDAMNIT MOM YOU'RE THE REASON I CAN'T MAKE FRIENDS!
Stranger: it was that bitch paige wasnt it. she made you do the pots
You: I JUST WANT TO BE ACCEPTED!!
You: I DID THE POTS BECAUSE I WANTED TO DO THE POTS
Stranger: how many did you take? 3? 5?
You: nobody made me!
You: i don't know... maybe like 3.. 3 or 4 potdrugs
You: I LOVE HER MOM!!
Stranger: thats how your brother died you know! he overdoesed on pots!
You: YOU CAN'T KEEP US APART!
You: Don't even bring Jason up!
Stranger: you don't luve her! thats the pots talking!
You: He died because he drank to much beers WHILE on the pots!
Stranger: but what about me davie? don't you love me?
You: mom come on like Bonn-o-Tron... please stop....
Stranger: remember that night on the beach....
You: MOM SHUT UPPPP
Stranger: you were so strong... so.... forceful
You: I WAS ONLY 12 THEN!
Stranger: when you held me in your arms.... and told me you loved me
You: I'm 45 now... almost a full grown man!
Stranger: and then we made love right there in the sand....
Stranger: you said i was your first
Stranger: and youd never forget
You: YOU said I was YOUR first!
You: YOU LIED TO ME THOUGH
You: You were making the love with dad before i was even born!
Stranger: oh he was just a crazy fling
Stranger: YOU were who really mattered to me
You: I put my penis in the place where you birthed me mom!
You: I felt so... so... DIRTY
You: i wish you had never told me how i was born
You: why did i have to be such a FREAK... coming out of my mom's love hole...
Stranger: when you caressed my mound... and i felt you enter my flower.... thats when i knew tho
Stranger: that we were meant to be
You: why couldn't i be like everyone else and just be brought by the baby faries!
You: mom i can't take this right now
You: im going to go smoke more pots
You: and you can't stop
Stranger: its that hussy paige and her rich parents who can afford the baby fairys huh?
You: then paige and i... we're going to do stuff!
You: stuff together!
You: we might even hold hands!
Stranger: no!! you stay away from her mound!
You: she might even let me french kiss her!
You: ewww mommm she's not my mom... i wouldn't touch her mound
Stranger: NO! DAMN THOSE FRANK BASTARDS!
You: i might touch her almond joy though...
Stranger: PUT PAIGE ON THE PHONE!
You: SHE DOESN'T LIKE YOU
Stranger: THIS INSTANT
Stranger: I don't CARE PUT HER ON!
Stranger: I NEED TO TALK TO HER!
Stranger: AND HER EVIL HUSSY POTS TAKING WAYS!
You: You KNOW she can't talk mom! She's made out of pillows and dress-up clothes!
You: UGH. I'm just going to come upstairs and talk to you myself!
Stranger: ill be waiting....
You: DON'T try to trick me into kissing your no no place again!
You: it tasted like fish sticks!
Stranger: oh i wont
You: With OUT the tartar sauce!
You: be right up.
You have disconnected.