Unfunny

[Silent-sigfig]

u're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Unfunny will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Unfunny are lying.
You: asl?
Stranger: 100, unknown, earth
You: Actually, I was wondering if you wanted Asian Sex Laborers.
You: But that's cool too.
Stranger: can the sew?
You: Yes. They can the sew.
Stranger: I need some knock off shoes to be made
You: I don't think that's in their area of expertise.
Stranger: these "abibbas" need to hit the street fast
You: Let me ask them
You: Sorry that toke so long. I forgot which key opened up their cell.
Stranger: this transaction is over then
You: They said they can. They work for minimum wage.
Stranger: they need to work for less than that
You: Let me slap them a bit.
Stranger: how am i supposed to make a profit?
You: I keep my pimp hand strong.
Stranger: lol
You: No, this is serious business.
Stranger: keep doing what your doing
You: Okay. They can work for $1 a day, but only if the conditions are terrible.
Stranger: you need to print up some business cards and strat advertising.
Stranger: get your name out ther
You: Cops shut me down last time I tried.
Stranger: the conditions are the terriblest
You: Oh, that's far worse than terribler
You: They can start immediately.
Stranger: they are so bad I had to make up a new word to describe the condition
Stranger: excellent
Stranger: put me in for an order of 60
You: Okay, I'll be shipping them over in crates soon.
Stranger: you do have 60 of them right?
You: yeah, i think.
You: Jesus christ, they've been breeding in there!
Stranger: you have males!?
You: No.
Stranger: that would not go over very well in the sex trade
You: Why else would I be so surprised?
Stranger: lol
Stranger: you are a true business man
You: The best.
Stranger: createing new products
Stranger: we shall have to do more business in the future
Stranger: I'll have my people call your people
You: Sure. Be sure to submit feedback at www.lemonparty.org.
Stranger: lol
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Unfunny will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Unfunny are lying.
You: asl?
Stranger: im looking for sex chat with pictures for masturbation with a 18+ girl
You: Actually, I was wondering if toy wanted asian sex laborors.
You: But that's cool too.
You: Fuck.
You: Spelling errors are unprofessional,
You have disconnected.

[Keldoclock]

Stranger: ı m looking for korean
You: i wreastle bears for a living
You: im looking for koreans too
You: i like to grill them sometimes
You: they's good eatin
Stranger: where are you from
You: A land where bears don't shit in the woods, because there are no woods, only bears.

Stranger: asL
You: Hello
You: sorry, i don't want Asian Sex Laborours
Stranger: do u have msn,
You: Male Swanky Negroes? no, i do not
You: i do have some hispanic men tho
You: you can buy em
You: they make good gardeners.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Unfunny will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Unfunny are lying.
Stranger: hi asl
You: hello
You: i don't want asian sex laborours, but thanks for offering
Stranger: wtf
Stranger: im not asian
You: they're useful, but i just don't have that kind of money
You: could make em work in my basement
You: sowing Shamwows
Stranger: no they r only usefull for sex
Stranger: they don't work
Stranger: they only know how to fuck
You: ah, they're just ass then
You: Asian Sex Slaves
Stranger: yes basically
You: i don't really like ass so much
You: exp if its fat ass
Stranger: and if u want ill give u a free trial for a month
You: that sounds very interesting, how fast could you have them shipped?
You: try and pack as many into a crate as you can
You: they're very flexible
Stranger: o well there on there way now
You: good good, Its nice to do buisness with a fellow pimp
Stranger: do u mind if they r used
You: I presume there will be a discount on used ass?
Stranger: yes yes it is
Stranger: no nope
Stranger: *points a pistol to ur head* get out of my fucking face bitch*
You: oh, that's a shame, perhaps i can send you some of my products too
You: HISPANIC GUY WITH RIFLE! GET HIM
Stranger: *shots the guy in the head with the other pistol in my hand*
You: don't make me get my black guys on you
You: they're really buff
You: and REALLY BLACK
Stranger: don't get me to get my friends on u there really like blood mate
You: they're so black they shit sneakers
You: i harvest the shit-sneakers
You: sell them at shoe stores
Stranger: ok then
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

[aoffan23]

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Unfunny will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Unfunny are lying.
You: Hey
You: asl?
Stranger: Are you a wizard?
You: yes
Stranger: O_O::::
You: I'm a wizard of GUNS
You: When I disappear, I don't use smoke
Stranger: HADOKEN (>o.o)>====)==>
You: I use GRENADES
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

[aoffan23]

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Unfunny will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Unfunny are lying.
Stranger: guess what!
You: chicken butt!
Stranger: damn!
Stranger: you win!
You: Yay!
Stranger: you get 1 trillion billion dollhairs
You: dollhairs?
You: aw man what the fuck?
You: Can I at least make them ionto money?
Stranger: thought i was gonna say dollers huh!
Stranger: if your good at weaving
You: Well, no
You: I thought you were gonna say dollars
Stranger: well dollers are beter
You: dollers are people who make dolls
You: they're beter?
You: that must be better than better to be beter
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

[jmatthew]

Silverdream, I was really enjoying your conversation--it even caused me to chuckle out loud... until you became a pussy and were afraid of offending a random stranger on the internet who would have likely incurred a hilarious amount of long-distance fees trying to repeatedly dial Clarissa Explanis.

Stranger: david?
Stranger: is that you?
You: mom?
Stranger: where are you
You: I TOLD YOU ALREADY! I'm at ryan's
Stranger: you were supposed to call
You: stop being a bitch! i told you i'd call later
You: goddddd
You: you're making me look SO uncool right now mom
You: girls are watching!
Stranger: its time to come home
Stranger: are you with paige?
You: awwwww mommmmm
You: yeah, why?
Stranger: you know what i told you about her
You: ok, but she does NOT have the clap. i asked her
Stranger: she is a lying hussy
You: she can see what you're saying!!
Stranger: did she make you smoke drugs?
You: NOOOOO
You: mom i told you already
You: i won't give in to peer pressure
You: okay, fine
Stranger: ARE YOU SMOKING DRUG JASON!!!
You: i may have smoked one or two pots!
Stranger: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
You: GODDAMNIT MOM YOU'RE THE REASON I CAN'T MAKE FRIENDS!
Stranger: it was that bitch paige wasnt it. she made you do the pots
You: I JUST WANT TO BE ACCEPTED!!
You: I DID THE POTS BECAUSE I WANTED TO DO THE POTS
Stranger: how many did you take? 3? 5?
You: nobody made me!
You: i don't know... maybe like 3.. 3 or 4 potdrugs
Stranger: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
You: I LOVE HER MOM!!
Stranger: thats how your brother died you know! he overdoesed on pots!
You: YOU CAN'T KEEP US APART!
You: Don't even bring Jason up!
Stranger: you don't luve her! thats the pots talking!
You: He died because he drank to much beers WHILE on the pots!
Stranger: but what about me davie? don't you love me?
You: mom come on... please stop....
Stranger: remember that night on the beach....
You: MOM SHUT UPPPP
Stranger: you were so strong... so.... forceful
You: I WAS ONLY 12 THEN!
Stranger: when you held me in your arms.... and told me you loved me
You: I'm 45 now... almost a full grown man!
Stranger: and then we made love right there in the sand....
Stranger: you said i was your first
Stranger: and youd never forget
You: YOU said I was YOUR first!
You: YOU LIED TO ME THOUGH
You: You were making the love with dad before i was even born!
Stranger: oh he was just a crazy fling
Stranger: YOU were who really mattered to me
You: I put my penis in the place where you birthed me mom!
You: I felt so... so... DIRTY
You: i wish you had never told me how i was born
You: why did i have to be such a FREAK... coming out of my mom's love hole...
Stranger: when you caressed my mound... and i felt you enter my flower.... thats when i knew tho
Stranger: that we were meant to be
You: why couldn't i be like everyone else and just be brought by the baby faries!
You: mom i can't take this right now
You: im going to go smoke more pots
You: and you can't stop
You: me
Stranger: its that hussy paige and her rich parents who can afford the baby fairys huh?
You: then paige and i... we're going to do stuff!
You: stuff together!
You: we might even hold hands!
Stranger: no!! you stay away from her mound!
You: she might even let me french kiss her!
You: ewww mommm she's not my mom... i wouldn't touch her mound
Stranger: NO! DAMN THOSE FRANK BASTARDS!
You: i might touch her almond joy though...
Stranger: PUT PAIGE ON THE PHONE!
You: SHE DOESN'T LIKE YOU
Stranger: THIS INSTANT
Stranger: I don't CARE PUT HER ON!
Stranger: I NEED TO TALK TO HER!
Stranger: AND HER EVIL HUSSY POTS TAKING WAYS!
You: You KNOW she can't talk mom! She's made out of pillows and dress-up clothes!
You: UGH. I'm just going to come upstairs and talk to you myself!
Stranger: FINE!
Stranger: ill be waiting....
Stranger: <33333333333
You: DON'T try to trick me into kissing your no no place again!
You: it tasted like fish sticks!
Stranger: oh i wont
You: With OUT the tartar sauce!
Stranger: teehee!
You: be right up.
You have disconnected.

[Ogel96]

But you guys had to see this.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Unfunny will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Unfunny are lying.
You: Afternoon, Johnson.
Stranger: Good evening, Samson.
You: I'm afraid there's been.... an accident.
Stranger: Oh?
You: Steve went to check on the Millers....
You: Oh lord.
You: How do I say this.....
You: Steve is dead.
Stranger: Hm. Well then.
You: God damn son of a bitchin cocksucking monkey shit-flinging bastard shot him right between the eyes.
Stranger: Goodness
You: I don't know why.
Stranger: Has he been arrested at least?
You: You think I called the cops?
You: You think they would be happy to find out what's going on here?
Stranger: I would have found it to be a safe assumption, yes
Stranger: Well, no, but..
Stranger: Wait..
Stranger: He died here?
You: No, but if they recognize either one of us, it's only a metter of time.
You: Matter.
Stranger: Well then
Stranger: Mind if I ask you a quick question?
You: God, I can't even speak right.
You: Yes?
Stranger: How do I put this...
Stranger: Who the fuck is Steve?
Stranger: And who the fuck are you.
You: Steve. Was. My. Fucking. Brother.
Stranger: Ah. Now then
Stranger: Who the fuck are you, then?
You: He. Was. Our. Buisness. Partner.
Stranger: Our?
You: I'm your partner, Adam!
Stranger: Adam?
You: What the fuck is going on with the world today?!
Stranger: I'm Ray O'Riely Johnson
You: You can't even remember your own name.
Stranger: I'm a dapper pro nstar
You: Dear lord, you're delirious!
Stranger: My buisness does not involve a man named Steve
You: Jesus, forgive him!
Stranger: Who?
You: Absolve him of this madness!
You: Holy Spirit!
Stranger: Absolve who?
Stranger: Who the hell is Jesus?
You: You, Adam!
Stranger: I'm Jesus?
You: Jesus is a prominent religious figure in Christianity.
Stranger: I'm a prominent religious figure in Christianity?
Stranger: Dude!
Stranger: Score!
You: As well as a minor one in Islam.
You: No, you're not!
Stranger: I'ma go get some followers
You: You're sick in the head!
You: Oh shit!
You: The cops!
Stranger: It's ok
You: The cops!
Stranger: I can take em.
Stranger: Stand back.
You: They've surrounded the building!
Stranger: No.
Stranger: The building has THEM surrounded
You: ADAM, WAIT, NO!
Stranger: SHINIHAU - MUKAI - KAMINAA
You: SHIT!
Stranger: JESUS POWERS ACTIVATE
You: ADAAAAAAAAMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!
Stranger: THIS IS MY TRUE FOOOOORRRMM!!!!
You: Jesus Christ no.
Stranger: I'm right here
Stranger: Don't use my name like that
You: You just stripped bare and grabbed a rope.
Stranger: Yes?
You: There is absolutely no rationale for that.
Stranger: Is there?
Stranger: How about when I twirl this rope counter clock wise so that FIRE SPITS OUT THE END AS IT TURNS INTO A COBRA?
You: I don't even know how to respond to that statement.
Stranger: Be in awe, it's ok
You: Except
Stranger: i'm Jesus afterall
You: THERE IS NO FUCKING COBRA, ADAM! YOU ARE NOT JESUS!
Stranger: YES THERE IS
Stranger: COBRA
Stranger: ATTACK HIM FOR HIS INSOLENCE
Stranger: HAGUH!
You: Oww!
Stranger: HAHA
Stranger: TASTE JUSTICE
You: Why'd you hit me with the rope?
You: That actually hurt a bit.
Stranger: Good.
Stranger: Damn, the cops are inside the building
Stranger: Protect your mesiah
You: Damn it all to hell.
Stranger: Stand in front of me while I conjure a spell
You: I am not going down like this.
You: NOT.
You: LIKE.
You: THIS!
Stranger: That's unfourtanate then
You: BLAM BLAM BLAM!
You: Now the cops are coming.
Stranger: Well, more so than before, but yes.
You: Use your goddamn jesus powers, Mister Messiah.
Stranger: CAN DO
Stranger: WHHHOOOOOOOOSSHHHHH
You: Dekill that kidnapped girl.
Stranger: DEKILLING POWERS ENGAGE
You: The one I just shot.
Stranger: Miss, you alright?
You: Okay, now you're just screwing her corpse.
Stranger: What?
Stranger: Am not.
Stranger: She's up and at 'em
Stranger: I revived the dead
You: YOU ARE FUCKING HER IN THE SKULL!
Stranger: You best be grateful
You: YOU HAVE REMOVED HER EYES
You: AND ARE LITERALLY FUCKING HER SKULL!
Stranger: My dick isn't even out
Stranger: el nigre you crazy
You: Then what's that?
Stranger: I performed a miracle and your just saying blasphemy
You: Your "Magic Cobra?"
Stranger: Fuck this shit, I'm outta here
You: Wait a sec
Stranger: No, that's over there
You: Lemme copy this conversation real quick
You: Alright, goodnight.
You: Jesus.
Stranger: Later man
Stranger: XD

And apologies to Scythe, for illegal use of his phrase.

[Ex-Lep]

no one will talk to you if you welcome them in chinese....

[Pwnerade]

I decided to try this unfunniness. It was very strange.

You: Hi
Stranger: do you wanna play a game?
You: What game?
Stranger: See if u can fap more than me. Fap! Fap! Fap!
You: Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap!
You: Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap!
Stranger: o rly?
You: Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap!
You: Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap! Fap!
Stranger: U the fap master, dump folders plz
Stranger: While I eat a coconut
You: What?
Stranger: I like coconuts and grapes
You: What about bananas?
Stranger: No, just coconuts and grapes for I am not tarzan of the apes
You: What a shame
Stranger: I'm at work, but wanna fap. What do?
You: Fap
Stranger: it would be to hard, I'm on cq
Stranger: In the armyyyyyy
You: Whats cq?
Stranger: Dumb shit the army has
Stranger: 24 hour shifts
You: What does cq stand for?
Stranger: Charge of quarters, I sit at a desk. And make sure no terrorists come into the buildings
You: I see
You: So, you're in the US Army, then?
Stranger: Yea
You: Where are you stationed?
You: And how do you do that for 24 hours?
You: You there man?
Stranger: yea
Stranger: Fort bliss
Stranger: Its hard to stay up but I get next day off
You: 24-hour shifts seem ridiculous
You: Doesn't sound helathy
Stranger: its fun
Stranger: I'm in the armmmmyy
You: You said that
You: You ever been overseas in the Army? My dad's been to Afghanistan.
Stranger: U should join, and be fap friends
You: I don't plan on either of those
Stranger: Yo
You: Yo what? Yo momma?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

[Pwnerade]

Stranger: hii
You: Hi
Stranger: asl
You: You're an anal sex lover? So am I!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

[razgriz 25th inf.]

my most recent convo:

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Unfunny will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Unfunny are lying.
Stranger: hello
You: you never called again.
You: i thought i loved you.
Stranger: you never gave me your number
Stranger: hurry up!!!,they are coming
You: you don't even remember me, do you? we loved each other for 3 years.
Stranger: Oh yes, how could i forget you
Stranger: ?
Stranger: those passionate kisses
You: mr. muffinballs died.
Stranger: the goose bumps
You: i have no one now
Stranger: I have muffin balls
Stranger: you can have them
You: how could you leave me? those were the best days of my life.
Stranger: you cheated on me
Stranger: hussy
You: don't try and justify what you did.
Stranger: well you tore my heart out
Stranger: and stomped it on the ground
Stranger: then set it afire
You: don't even pretend it was my fault. you know what you did.
Stranger: I didnt mean to leave that seat up
You: you never even called me back.
Stranger: things will never be the same for me
You: like you think you know what its like.
You: you don't know anthing.
Stranger: well i was half of this three way
Stranger: wasnt I?
You: no, you wernt there for that. you didnt even get to see your kid grow up.
You: hes a architect now. AN ARCHITECT!
Stranger: but i go to se him in prison don't I?
Stranger: he builds with sticks
You: but you don't care anymore. im glad youre gone.
Stranger: not an architect
Stranger: well fine then
Stranger: time for me to bounce
You: you don't even care about me anymore, do you?
Stranger: ........boing........
Stranger: not anymore...i have your sister now
You: yes, walk away, just like you did before. your so good at it now.
You: do what you do best. leave.
Stranger: hey...relax man
Stranger: you will find another
You: me and john don't want you anymore.
Stranger: .wait....what?
Stranger: John???
Stranger: thats my name
You: THATS YOUR SONS NAME! YOUR SON!!!
Stranger: oh i see
Stranger: oh yeah ...him
Stranger: sorry
Stranger: i forg.........neveermind
You: NO WONDER YOU LEFT! BECAUSE YOU don't GIVE A SHIT!
Stranger: I have no shit to give
You: well i don't want it anyways!
Stranger: you took it all
Stranger: all the shit,,,you took it all
You: because you left it all in such a hurry!
You: you didnt have time to take it!
Stranger: I had to crawl away
Stranger: you took my kneecaps too
You: and there in a display case for everyone to see!
You: im proud now. you never let me have even that.
Stranger: nice...you got a display case for them?
Stranger: you really do love me
You: im proud i hurt you. proud your gone.
You: i do love you. but not like i did.
Stranger: well let me make it up to you
You: i don't want what you have.
Stranger: heres $ 12.64
Stranger: its all I have
You: i just want closure. why did you leave?
Stranger: because...
You: you don't even know why?!!!!
You: YOU SON OF A BITCH!!!!!
Stranger: it was your hair
Stranger: it was too...
Stranger: light
Stranger: and smelled too good
You: well i never changed it. so there.
Stranger: for me to stay and be happy
You: it smelled good compared to you.
Stranger: yes it did
Stranger: when i would lean down and smell it
Stranger: gently brush it from your neck
Stranger: your sexy neck
You: lets not bring necks into this!!!!
Stranger: push it away from your pretty eyes
You: or eyes!
Stranger: pulling it in the heat of passion
Stranger: as i took you
You: well?
Stranger: do you remember?
Stranger: i would lift you body up as I thrusted into you
You: of course i remember. but i don't want to.
Stranger: deep inside of you?
Stranger: you would softly scream my name
Stranger: you would squeeze my shaft inside of you
You: whatever youre trying to do, it wont work. i will never get back with you.
Stranger: you would arch your back
Stranger: i would firmly grasp your ass
Stranger: as i drove into you and then pulled back out
Stranger: you would drip with pleasure
Stranger: I would lift you onto the bed
Stranger: and put your soft legs on my broad shoulders
You: i will never get back with you. you always thought about sex, but never about us as a family.
Stranger: gently push the head of my thick cock into your vagina
Stranger: well its the best i could do
Stranger: wasnt that enough?
You: no. because you only cared about sex. never me, nor the kid that was inside me. NEVER.
Stranger: I only cared about the feelings i had with you...not sex
Stranger: what we did wasnt sex
You: sex was the only feeling you ever cared about!
Stranger: it was ............
Stranger: paassion
Stranger: romance
You: it was passion when you still cared about me.
Stranger: walking hand in hand
Stranger: I only cared about you
Stranger: you and our child
Stranger: John
Stranger: our son
You: john was born AFTER you left me.
Stranger: our beautiful baby
Stranger: well then our beautiful embryo
You: don't you remember? i had to care for a baby by myself.
Stranger: his little sperm shaped head
Stranger: and egg shaped butt
You: please, just go. like youre so good at.
Stranger: but I can't forget you...(psst ..whats your name again...a0
You: please, just go.
Stranger: ok GOODBYE

You: *starts crying*
Stranger: who ever you are
Stranger: wait...heres a tissue
You: I don't WANT IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Stranger: its soft and smells good
Stranger: like you
Stranger: OK THEN
Stranger: GOODBYE
You: GO! NOW!
Stranger: FOREVER
You: GOOD!
Stranger: you hang up first ...ok?
You: FUCK YOU!
Stranger: thats not nice
You: I don't CARE! YOU don't EITHER, APPARENTLY!
Stranger: well i do care
You: NO, YOU don't!
Stranger: i will trade in my bike for money to start over with you
Stranger: wait, did i say my bike?
You: I don't CARE! don't WANT A NEW START! YOU HAD YOUR CHANCE!
Stranger: how about if i sweep you off your feet
Stranger: carry you to the bedroom
You: NO! JUST, PLEASE! GO!
Stranger: and make sweet sweet love to you?
You: THERE YOU GO AGAIN! ALL ABOUT SEX!
Stranger: only with you
You: YOU JUST WANT BACK IN MY PANTS!
Stranger: and a couple of other girls
Stranger: you wear pants now...you hussy
You: YOU don't CARE ABOUT ME! JUST MY VAGINA!
Stranger: you only wore those wool dresses before
You: IF YOU don't GO I WILL!
Stranger: hte ones that came up to your chin
Stranger: OK THEN GO
You: BYE YOU SON OF A BITCH!
Stranger: GOOD BYE MY LOVE
You: I don't LOVE YOU ANYMORE!
You have disconnected.

also known as, longest. convo. ever.

[Pwnerade]

I had an incredibly long one, but I didn't save it. I now have a friend in Finland.

[Jbgarrison]

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Unfunny will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Unfunny are lying.
You: hello
Stranger: hello
Stranger: asl
You: im new to the internet, what's asl mean?
Stranger: m 22
You: what is m 22, that sounds like a weapon
You: are you army?
Stranger: a mean age n s mean sex n l mean location
You: a mean?
You: are you angry?
You: what is mean sex?
Stranger: r u male or female
You: I'm both
You: are you into that?
Stranger: how
Stranger: r u dapper
You: how can i be dapper?
Stranger: i see
You: you scare me because you said mean sex
You: sex isn't mean
Stranger: u have a pussy
You: a few
You: 3
Stranger: teri maa ki chut or teri sister ki chut
Your conversational partner has disconnected

[Jbgarrison]

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Unfunny will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Unfunny are lying.
Stranger: hhhhi
Stranger: asl
You: hello
You: what's asl?
Stranger: age
Stranger: m/f
Stranger: location
You: you first
Stranger: ?????????
Stranger: 22 m
Stranger: ur
You: I'm the cyberpolice
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

[Jbgarrison]

Stranger: indian??
You: Yes
Stranger: female??
You: Cyberpolice
Stranger: wht??
You: I am the cyberpolice and you are being reported
Stranger: hahaha
Stranger: as i guessed
You: Racism against Indians is not allowed in chat
Stranger: fuck u
Stranger: i m a khalistaani
You: You are being reported to the khalistaani cyberpolice
Stranger: and i can do any thing u boody dogs
You: you are also being reported for threatening to do harm to boody dogs
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

[Jbgarrison]

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Unfunny will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Unfunny are lying.
Stranger: hi
You: hi
Stranger: asl?
You: I am the cyberpolice
You: I have backtraced you
You: you dun' goofed
Stranger: bodo amat!
Stranger: siape elu
Stranger: ga peduli
You: consequences will never be the same
Stranger: terus?
Stranger: wong edan!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.