Show off your armies and weaponry and stuff.
Moderators: Zahru II, Bragallot, RedRover, Natalya
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Soren
- Champion
- Posts: 29
- Joined: Fri Dec 30, 2011 11:42 pm
- Location: Oops, I slipped and fell in your mom.
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by Soren » Mon Jan 16, 2012 7:31 pm
Officially, that stands for Autonomous State of Mesda Defense, but we all know what it
really means.
...the Mesdan Auxiliary Regiment were raised to suppress mining revolts on the surface of their home world, Adorinda. When the regime that backed Colonel Noventa's rise through the ranks fell, the new President acted swiftly to disband them - by force. In a 28-hour battle, the regiment broke out, captured the spaceport, and escaped into orbit - foiling pursuit by the admirably direct method of detonating a 12MT fissile device over the port. Their careers as mercenaries had begun...
I remember it a little different. Mostly the sulfur smell and the dust getting into everything.
Fuck, it really did. We changed the buttplugs every hour and it was still clogging the intakes. Blowing the port was an improvement on that shithole.
Anyway, we've been 'volunteered' to introduce you soft bastards at home to the hardware. I'll be the first to admit we're rough around the edges - and the surfaces, and the insides...
You know, maybe I'm gettin' soft in my old age, but I think we prob'ly coulda made it
without nuking all those poor civvie bastards at the port.
'Maybe' she says. You're in the wrong outfit for rescuin' kittens, Tosca. 'Less you wanna wear a nurse's uniform with a short skirt while I-
Can it, you two. We're recording.
'Poor bloody' is right. You scrub, and scrub, but those god-damn armored environment suits smell like ball sweat after two hours, just the same.
Tosca'd know, right Captain?
...
Stefansen, it's like you think I'm not gonna give you shit-burning duty or something.
They're nasty-minded pigfuckers at the best of times, and that heavy armor gets pretty sweaty and gross inside - doesn't improve their disposition one bit. I'm proud to have 'em around, even if they do nearly as much damage to the port bars as the enemy.
That fucker Cortezar especially. I think the MPs shit themselves a little when he's on the sauce.
Not to say that MPs don't shit themselves habitually.
Fucking right.
Anyway, you might have noticed we deploy a lot of heavy infantry in sealed suits. Personally, I just like that it keeps them from spraying all over the tank when they go pop, but we do a lot of fighting in hostile terrain and chemical battlefields, and it's nice when the crunchies don't die too easy.
Yeah, still creepy-lookin'. Can't shake the old boot-camp stories about the docs using casualties to provide brain matter for the combat computer. Maintenance swears it's bullshit, but I don't trust anybody who steals like they do. By the way, where's my spare track, you fucking thieves?
Chop the shit out of aircraft with those railers, though, right out to the horizon. Can't fault 'em for that.
You can when half the time they nearly get
us, dipshit. No target discrimination a-tall.
Really, you gotta be crazy. It's way too fast, it's fragile, and it's got a big fucking grenade launcher strapped to it.* 'Look ma, no hands'!
Better them than us, though. I like it just fine when the crazy fuckers draw fire off me.
Chatty on the comms, too. It's like they forget someone's shooting at 'em.
*Fortunately, all those add up to a big, shiny minifig magnet in the great tradition of $3 polybag space sets, so there's no shortage of pilots.
I love these things. Not that I'd say that to any cannon-cocker's face, but you need backup, they're there, waiting to blast your target right off the map.
(falsetto) Ooh, Captain likes a
big gun!
You'd almost think he
enjoys the latrines.
That's my girl, #7
Suzy Q. 120 tons, 60mm railgun, couple racks of missiles, and plenty of attitude. Leaving the other guy with shit in his pants and abject failure on his mind.
Helps that you've got me along.
Helps with what? It's not like you're much of a driver, the way you keep clipping off the antenna going under bridges. I can't do my job if you keep fucking up our gear.
Tits, if you got a problem with my driving you can suck-
Shit-burning, Stefansen. For the
rest of your life.
I hate sentry guns. Fucking. Hate. They never hit what they're supposed to hit if you set them too low, and if you set them too high, they burn out all their ammo and spray squirrel parts everywhere, oh, and you can fool the fucking things with a cheap-ass thermal blanket.
I
can't sack them, they're my best tank crew. And they
know it.
Last edited by
Soren on Sun Feb 19, 2012 10:46 pm, edited 9 times in total.
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OneEye589
- Pooplord
- Posts: 3228
- Joined: Sat Jul 19, 2008 6:35 pm
- Location: New York
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Contact:
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by OneEye589 » Mon Jan 16, 2012 7:57 pm
That tank is pretty awesome. All in all great, and good photography to top it off.
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mgb519
- My Little Pony
- Posts: 1945
- Joined: Thu May 26, 2011 8:50 pm
- Location: ATL
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by mgb519 » Mon Jan 16, 2012 8:13 pm
CURSE YOU AND YOUR BETTER-THAN-MINE-OWN SPACE MARINES!
Tzan wrote:Semaj Nagirrac wrote:Well, I took some land without checking if it was owned by a faction or not. I'm not going to be banned, am I? I can destroy everything if need be.
That's what
Hitler said,
in 1938.
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Theblackdog
- Pooplord
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by Theblackdog » Mon Jan 16, 2012 8:30 pm
Welcome to Brikwars! I'm glad you're here -- I've been a fan of your mocpages and Flickr stuff for a while. Of these, the tank and the hoverbike are probably my favorites. I especially like the angled wedge pieces on the tank.
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Silverdream
- Nice use of noise
- Posts: 6078
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- Location: Sweating like a guy in a basketball manga
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by Silverdream » Mon Jan 16, 2012 8:35 pm
OneEye589 wrote:That tank is pretty awesome. All in all great, and good photography to top it off.
Not to mention your faction's name.
lol j/k
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Soren
- Champion
- Posts: 29
- Joined: Fri Dec 30, 2011 11:42 pm
- Location: Oops, I slipped and fell in your mom.
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by Soren » Mon Jan 16, 2012 9:03 pm
Responding to the post below for lulz - thanks to the rest of you, but you should be medicated or something.
BrikSaber wrote:6. Your army is ossum.
7. Welcome to the forums.
8. Your name references a book series for 10 year olds why?
9. Don't answer that, I'd like it to remain a mystery.
10. So I assume you like owls.
11. I'm running out of things to write. Bye now.
#6&7 Thanks!
#8 Hunh. I just pulled a name starting with M out of my folder of made-up monkeyshit. Or you're referring to something else.
#9 Oops.
#10 No, too crunchy. Pheasant is better.
#11 Okay then!
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Silent-sigfig
- can you feel me?
- Posts: 2558
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- Location: Number one in USA
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by Silent-sigfig » Mon Jan 16, 2012 9:31 pm
The marine on the far right loves reading.
BFenix wrote:Silent-sigfig wrote:
Coolest 1000th post ever
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RagnarokRose
- u a MILLION wus and only then shall you become the MISTRESS
- Posts: 3941
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by RagnarokRose » Mon Jan 16, 2012 10:25 pm
Goddammit I know that name. Soren. Why is that familiar.
TO GOOGLE.
she/her | formerly known as ross_varn | exiled for the good of the f.e.l.c.
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Pwnerade
- Mega Blok
- Posts: 1264
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- Location: Kent, WA
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by Pwnerade » Mon Jan 16, 2012 11:00 pm
An army marches on its stomach, and its favorite food is fudge.
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RunsWithLegos
- Official Duck
- Posts: 2245
- Joined: Mon Apr 19, 2010 6:45 pm
- Location: Boston, MA, USA
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by RunsWithLegos » Mon Jan 16, 2012 11:27 pm
Freaking awesome mate. have you fought any battles yet?
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gaunt
- Officer
- Posts: 138
- Joined: Sun Mar 16, 2008 1:57 pm
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by gaunt » Tue Jan 17, 2012 12:43 am
I would absolutely love to see these guys in action. Nothin like bulky space marines backed up by some sleek vehicles.
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Zupponn
- if you give us money we will give you product
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by Zupponn » Tue Jan 17, 2012 12:50 am
Ross_Varn wrote:Goddammit I know that name. Soren. Why is that familiar.
TO GOOGLE.
This is what I thought of.
Also, really awesome stuff here. Hoping to see them in a battle.
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OneEye589
- Pooplord
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by OneEye589 » Tue Jan 17, 2012 1:09 am
What the hell are those black and whites boxes with numbers in them on that Magic Card? Why does he not have an attack/defense?
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Zupponn
- if you give us money we will give you product
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by Zupponn » Tue Jan 17, 2012 1:21 am
OneEye589 wrote:What the hell are those black and whites boxes with numbers in them on that Magic Card? Why does he not have an attack/defense?
He's one of them shiny new(ish) Planeswalkers. The bottom right box is his starting loyalty. The other boxes are his abilities that either add or subtract loyalty from him. You may only use 1 ability on your turn at sorcery speed. If his loyalty drops below 1, then he is destroyed. Any damage dealt to you can be redirected to the Planeswalker by the damage's controller, which then lowers the loyalty by that amount.
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OneEye589
- Pooplord
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by OneEye589 » Tue Jan 17, 2012 2:01 am
What the fuck.
I stopped playing at the first Mirrodin sets.