Dwarf Fortress Discussion

[Keldoclock]

If I had a normal computer I would so do this, but my current jury rigged POS(slapped it together outta junk until the summer where i will be employed once more) has 1GB ram and chugs on youtube videos. Sorry.

[IVhorseman]

Oh jesus, so I've been running a pretty sizeable fortress at the foothills of some jungle mountains. I've managed to get my population up to 180ish dwarves, and The King has arrived to take his throne in Ancientmarks, The Awe-Inspiring Bloodmark of Guilt!

However, I have also discovered that the king of my local dwarven government is a vampire, who has been ruling for over 200 years in his undying state. He has over 5000 kills to his name.

THE. FUCK.

So what the hell do I do? Is this even a problem? I mean on the one hand, he's immortal, but on the other, he's gonna start draining all of my dwarves of their blood...

[mgb519]

Make sure you have an influx of population.

[IVhorseman]

More importantly, should I not choose to wall the king up somewhere, how do I control his feeding so he only kills the shitty farmers and new immigrants?

[mgb519]

Make sure none of your people are really good.

[Keldoclock]

Just mod the save file and make him into an elf or puppy or something.

[IVhorseman]

Actually I think I have it figured out: I have decided to serve my new dark lord, for the good of the dwarven kingdom.

I'm gonna put his awesome throne room in the fortress prison, where he shall be assigned to that burrow. From there, he shall haunt the halls, be accessible by diplomats, and drain the blood of those who dare oppose his dwarven law. The prisons shall menace with platinum chains for his excellency, for maximum heavy and value.

The halls shall echo with their screams.

[Scottsman]

I love dwarf fortress.

[IVhorseman]

Haven't gotten him to feed yet, but ideally the prisons will keep themselves stocked: whenever guards "find" a drained prisoner, I can just accuse some shitty migrant of the crime, and it's off to the dungeons with him for the cycle to repeat!

[501stCadians]

Haven't gotten him to feed yet, but ideally the prisons will keep themselves stocked: whenever guards "find" a drained prisoner, I can just accuse some shitty migrant of the crime, and it's off to the dungeons with him for the cycle to repeat!

Kali Ma! Kali Ma!

[Arkbrik]

Haven't gotten him to feed yet, but ideally the prisons will keep themselves stocked: whenever guards "find" a drained prisoner, I can just accuse some shitty migrant of the crime, and it's off to the dungeons with him for the cycle to repeat!

Genius.

[Scottsman]

See if you can't get him to bleed in the water supply. Then you get even more vampires. Or better yet, make him bleed in a supply only certain dwarfs (likely nobles) have access to, resulting in a vampire ruling class.

[muffinman42]

I just had a dwarf survive being hit with a minecart that had gone down a 30Z level ramp. You would of think the blood of the previous hauler would be hint enough "DO NOT SIT ON THE TRACK"... He got hit in the ear, the impact that ripped apart the previous hauler and decorated the room with blood, left the new hauler a bit disorientated and without a left ear.
What the actual.

Also:

Now if they had it with mushroom it would be the true staple of dwarf cuisine.

[Scottsman]

I didn't notice we were running low on food. The next day we ate cat sandwiches.

[muffinman42]

I noticed we were running low on food. The next day we ate cat sandwiches.

Fixed that for you.
Butcher everything immigrants bring, or keep for breeding to then cut up their off spring*.
(*the animals that is, though you could make babies edible.)

In other news a dog was wandering up a minecart track, Of course a minecart hit it at full speed and threw it down the ramp, leaving a long trail of blood, where it crumpled into a wall before the cart hit it again chucking it out into a pile of stone.
It survived; with just about every internal organ bruised. I'm contemplating dog stew, but it's the only bitch and i need those puppies for leather.