Zombie (Zulu) Dawn Turn 5

They're all the rage

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Postby kiemaster » Mon Jan 11, 2010 2:32 pm

muffinman42 wrote:
kiemaster wrote:whens the bitches turn?????

waits for stubby to turn that comment around

Lol.


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Postby Warhead » Mon Jan 11, 2010 5:52 pm

The Peach Pirates

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Captain Badass, the Peach Champion tries to rush the command centres defenders. Unfortunately, the Tough Ombries were waiting for him.

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Caught in the midst of a flaming inferno our ignited hero presses on with an act of utter Stupendousness.

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Despite being shot and hit three times by a Tough Ombrie and a Manly Man Trooper he finally makes it up the ramp and into the base. He then proceeds to spoil it all by fluffing his attack and only knocking the Manly Man to the ground, hey-ho.

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Some Peach Pirates climb onto the gantry. Peach Princes Leia pays the ultimate price for going first.

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Other Peaches rush the Immortal Digit, lots of shots but only one hit and that doesn't beat his armour. The trapped Wookie attempts to free himself and is crushed for his trouble.

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The remaining Peaches dick about with nothing else to do since the doorway's on fire. One finds a Motorbike!..

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...Two others climb onto a hay cart and start shooting at the Manly Men through an arch.

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A Wookie and a daring Peach also lay down some fire through the flames.

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Scratch one Tough Ombrie.
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Postby Warhead » Mon Jan 11, 2010 6:11 pm

The Bitches

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The Strap-On Auto Cannon and the Big Bitch fire on the Creeper. One of the Big Bitches Crystal Gun's explodes on a critical taking her arm off. The hits just bounce off the Creepers armour.

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The Man Bitch that fell off the roof gets up and grabs the dead Lil' Bitches Laser Sword...

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While the Creepers distracted, and having rolled two critical successes in a row the Man Bitch beheads the Creeper with one mighty swing.

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The Gimp following orders, sort of attacks the Undead below, with a sword.

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However, it sort of pays off. Although the Undead isn't injured neither is the Gimp as he lands on him and they both start to struggle.

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The Construction Worker Man Bitch finds some stuff. A Laser Blaster, two Frag Grenades and some sort of Alcohol that's labelled Cheap'N'Fuckin'Nasty - Maniac Beer.

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Unwilling to leave her people exposed to the Undead the Grand Bitchess veto's her orders and instructs her Bitches to take a defensive stance. The Titty Flamer waits for the Zombies to close while the others open fire on the approaching Undead.

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Two more Undead take a nap.
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Postby Warhead » Mon Jan 11, 2010 6:23 pm

The Time Travelling Super Jews

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Commander Horowitz leads his men into the space port. They spread out looking for targets.

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The Heavy Weapons crews provide covering fire.

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Troopers secure the Gantry.

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A unit of Cleavers lead the way.

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The Cleaver Leader takes his first head.

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Ice-maker the Assassin climbs onto the landing pad overhead.

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Some Big Bitches open fire at a Bounty Hunter below but miss, he does not. Those who haven't fired remain on overwatch, just in case.
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Postby Warhead » Mon Jan 11, 2010 6:33 pm

TUNE IN TOMORROW NIGHT FOR THE CONCLUSION OF TURN 5 IN THE UNDEAD STRIKE BACK!.. and then the end phase with ego table update.
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Postby fredde » Tue Jan 12, 2010 3:38 am

WOAH!

this has to be the best forumbattle i have ever read its so epic!
but i have to say that i think the super jews have a bit of an advantage due to their numbers anyhow great job!
i look forward to the next part! :D
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Postby Massam » Tue Jan 12, 2010 11:15 am

NAh, zombies are better in numbers..and the immortals are a pain in the ass to kill.
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Postby kiemaster » Tue Jan 12, 2010 11:56 am

well that went better then planned lol
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Postby jmatthew » Tue Jan 12, 2010 12:59 pm

I've never been interested in reading a forum battle report before, but with Warhead running it, how could I resist?
This is so fucking epic.
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Postby Warhead » Tue Jan 12, 2010 5:46 pm

Thanks lads.

@jmatthew: Well, I guess that's at least one of you who reads it. Lol. :lol:

On with the show!..

THE

<a href="http://media.photobucket.com/image/the army of darkness logo/FalcoColumbarius/funny-pictures-the-army-of-darkness.jpg?o=1" target="_blank"><img src="http://i295.photobucket.com/albums/mm135/FalcoColumbarius/funny-pictures-the-army-of-darkness.jpg" border="0"></a>

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Undead Gordon Ramsey and his Zombie F'N'Chefs close in on Commander Leonidus.

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Some are drawn away towards the Heavy Flamer dude as he is closest.

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Zombies never know when to lie down. This one can't hurt the VOL, his armours too strong. However, he has grappled him and the VOL can't move until the Zombies dead.

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The Wight Captain fires a lucky shot killing an Assyrian. I don't rate his chances of survival though.

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Mini-Warhead picks up a Bomb. Freeze or the Bomb gets it!.. what ever shall he do with it? You might find out next turn.

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Finally the undead manage to enter the fort while still in one peace and animated. No more defenders die there...

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...but the Survivors Scout dude buys the farm after taking a shot at a Stalker. They both hose him down with mini-gin fire and a heavy laser takes his head off. The Stalker survived unharmed btw. The other heavy laser fires on the Super Jews but fails to hit.

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The struggle between the Undead and the Bitch Gimp continues unresolved.

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The Titty Guns fire without effect but the Titty Flamer takes three Undeads out of the game permanently.

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The Man Bitch that killed the Creeper is contemptuously dispatched by a Wight Knight on his way past.

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The Red Baron De'Ath Charge towards the Super Jews.

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De'Aths Undead Horde turn their advance toward the Bitches and Super Jews. There are just a few of them.
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Postby Warhead » Tue Jan 12, 2010 6:02 pm

++++++++++++END PHASE+++++++++++


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A Ripper (A Close Combat version of the Stalker) and a Creeper appear near the Fort.

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They're accompanied by a band of Yellow Slavers, they're Peaches who hunt and capture Yellows. They have two Hunters (the dudettes with skull heads and knives) and a load of Undeads. (These aren't Birdmans to control).

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A bunch of Iceworld... sorry, fuckin' Iceworlders turned undead show up. They had been having a Stag Party and got Undeaded. Careful, these guys have better armour.

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The rest of the Assyrian Troopers arrive, the ones that had died in the Underground Peach Lab. Don't worry, that's the last of them. Again, Undeads with better armour, but still only undeads, not Wights.

Well, that should do... still have some surprises to produce though at some point. :twisted:
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Postby Warhead » Tue Jan 12, 2010 6:12 pm

...And now over to the PROTO-FIGS for the scores...

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++++++++++EGO TABLE OF BOASTING RIGHTS++++++++++

The Britannian League:

KIA: 10
KILLS: 20 + 1 Hero (The Daemon Prince Dragosani)

The Post Apoc Survivors

KIA: 4
KILLS: 9 + 1 Champion (ZMJ)

The Bitches

KIA: 8
KILLS: 11 + 1 Creeper

Daemons

KIA: 7
KILLS: 9

The Manly Men

KIA: 8
KILLS: 12

The VOL:

KIA: 4
KILLS: 21

The Assyrians

KIA: 3
KILLS: 18 + 2 Creepers
OBJECTIVE: Computer Core

The Peach Pirates

KIA: 2
Kills: 1

The Immortal Family

KIA: 0
Kills: 4

Time Travelling Super Jews

KIA: 0
Kills: 2

Proto-Figs

KIA: 0
KILLS: 1x Nipleripple
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Postby Warhead » Tue Jan 12, 2010 6:16 pm

Overviews

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+++++++NOW ACCEPTING ORDERS FOR TURN 6 +++++++
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Postby Bragallot » Tue Jan 12, 2010 6:38 pm

I'd board that fighter and crash-land it on De'Ath's horde. Anyway, I think the undead got ahead this round, but the VoL is gonna cook up some cooks.
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Postby Tuefish » Tue Jan 12, 2010 7:23 pm

Bragallot wrote:the VoL is gonna cook up some cooks.


Hell yeah! Zombie Flambe anyone?
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