Hope's last stand: turn 4

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Hope's last stand: turn 4

Postby piltogg » Tue Jul 27, 2010 8:34 pm

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The last gladiator: viper, decided that he had clearly not celebrated enough yet. So he garbed the lovely barmaid, riped off her pants, and started snuggling that hoe.
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Due to his beer-induced strength, her head just couldn't take the pressure he was laying down, thus it shot off with a velocity high enough to kill a regular man three times over. right at captain oX.
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This ended captain oX's kill spree which he had worked ever so hard to achieve. gotta hate those killjoys.
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Postby Warhead » Tue Jul 27, 2010 8:36 pm

Killed by humping hoe head... well that's gotta be a first. :lol:
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Postby Silent-sigfig » Tue Jul 27, 2010 8:39 pm

A three-picture turn. I like it.
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Coolest 1000th post ever :D
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Postby piltogg » Tue Jul 27, 2010 8:46 pm

yes, it gives new meaning to "I f*cked her brains out"

anyway....
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capt. Vesuvius jumped out into the middle of the arena and screamed "sabotage!"
:mystery: but nothing happened :mystery:
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In an attempt to survive the turn. the two remaining teletroopers holed up in the baracks. finding lots of guns and grenades and stuff in it.
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The last of the Setanian rough riders turned around and charged his ninja attackers, ending two of them.
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Postby piltogg » Tue Jul 27, 2010 8:49 pm

Silent-sigfig wrote:A three-picture turn. I like it.



well the teams are all getting very dead. as when I roll dice, I almost always get sixes. so turns tend to be short. most of the interesting stuff happened at the end of the turn this time.
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Postby piltogg » Tue Jul 27, 2010 8:55 pm

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The immortal at the turret, fliped his gun around and aimed at the biggest thing he could find: the apc
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He ripped the roof and Armor straight off the thing, and filled the engine full of holes.
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The lazor-skull fired on the gladiator, with it's lazor beam.
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Evaporating his head.
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Postby Warhead » Tue Jul 27, 2010 9:00 pm

Yay! If thin enemy offends thee, blow off his head.
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Postby piltogg » Tue Jul 27, 2010 9:02 pm

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The three remaining Beradans took up a more defensible position, then began to fire on the teleportation accelerator with everything they had.
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They dealt 8 more damage to it. (now 11/30 left) breaking it some more.
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Postby piltogg » Tue Jul 27, 2010 9:16 pm

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The Kaiser jumped on top of the teleportation accelerator, so that he could redshirt for it next turn.
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The remaining ninjas fired on the Rough rider...
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slaying him and his penis.
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two of the nazis ran behind the apc clearly planning something very nefarious that only total nazis would do.
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The other jumped up on one of the giant eggs and threw his stielenhandgeratte.
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it landed right on target, inside the barracks, next to teletroops.
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Break it down dj. du!du!du! explosion time!!!!!!!
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luckily, the teletroops had not fired, so they used thier reactions to doge the grenade and subsequent explosion. one made it, the other did not.
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Piltogg did survey the battlefield, looking for some way to show off his strength and make these silly soldiers flee like the cowards they truly are.
he saw a nice big building... the baracks!
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He flipped it over, in front of the teleportation accelerator.
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and blocking the Beradans line of sight.
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Postby piltogg » Tue Jul 27, 2010 9:47 pm

Far, far away. on the other side of Akkadia.... some crazy shit was going on like Bonn-o-Tron. first off, the most brutal metal band ever to exist, The Dirgeable's lament. was setting up for a concert next to the laboratory of the Akkadian inventor Leonardo. Hearing this music, Leonardo began to construct a great machine, this machine would transfer all the brutality and epicness of this metal into a liquid form.
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Once construction of this machine was finished, the band began to play, with such ferocity as to shame even bands like dragonforce.
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The end result; liquid metal. very interesting, but what use for such a thing is there?
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Leonardo's very sexy and bloodthirsty assistant Ophelia had an Idea. The liquid metal could be poured into a cast and be formed into a sword with much the same properties as a beamsaber or a Nova sword.
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The end result... A blade of the blackest and most brutal metal, The NACHTMAHR.
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But was such a blade really worth the trouble of creating it? Ophelia began to test it's powers.... It could cut through anything as if it were not even there. And anything even close to where the blade touched burst into flames. In addition, when she swung the blade, but made no contact, it sang out like a power cord from an electric guitar., so powerfully, that it knocked her off her feet.
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And so it was, that the very first Akkadian uber-trooper was created, equipped with a personal teleporter and a Nachtmahr, he was the perfect weapon. And once the teleportation accelerator is fully operational, it would be his task to take out the entire fleet of ships on route to Akkadia. This he would surely accomplish, as his personal teleporter would allow him to move far faster than the targeting systems of any ship the enemies of Akkadia could hope to muster. And because this was a personal teleporter, rather than a teleportation pad, most anti-teleportation technology would be completely ineffective against it.
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(I tried to use simple parts so it can be replicated)
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Postby piltogg » Tue Jul 27, 2010 9:58 pm

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overviews and shit

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reporter's eye view.
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Kill list..... f that. maybe tomorrow.
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Postby aoffan23 » Wed Jul 28, 2010 2:05 am

Awwww :C

Oh well, at least I went out with a bang, literally. :lol:

Also, I accomplished my objective I think. Woo.
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Postby stubby » Wed Jul 28, 2010 12:47 pm

piltogg wrote:when I roll dice, I almost always get sixes.

I'm starting to suspect that piltogg is actually the Old Spice Guy. I don't know why I never realized it before.
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Postby Tzan » Wed Jul 28, 2010 1:25 pm

I'm playing BrikWars.
I'm rolling dice.
Now look at your man's die roll.
Now look at mine.
I always roll sixes!
Your man can never always roll sixes like me.
But he can smell like me.
With Old Nerd Spice.
I'm playing NetHack.
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Postby Warhead » Wed Jul 28, 2010 2:05 pm

:lol:

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Hey Silva' you need some of this stuff.
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