Infighting starts before anyone even leaves the table.
"I shoot ooyama
I empty several full magazines vaguely in his direction"
"I’ll shoot you"
"well we found one imposter"
"Staples. That was easy."
"oh god oh fuck"
"I will shoot spectral"
"man you guys are horrible"
"What the fuck"
"Why did Ooyama say Spectral specifically... "
Some of the spacemen leave the cafeteria, grabbing pistols on the way out.
Purple turns on the water while several spacemen line up at the vending machine.
Orange grabs two candy bars out of the vending machine.
He drops one on the table, keeps the other for himself, and runs out of the room shouting.
"I'm allergic to peanuts! Why did I let corporate marketing convince me the only way to make someone act normal was a nut product???"
He runs into Medbay and snorts some drugs.
Meanwhile, tasks are happening.
Purple doubles back to inspect the candy bar for sabotage.
Orange grabs an OTC
and a DeathGun from Security.
On Turn 7, an alarm goes off.
"Warning. Reactor critical. 6 turns to overload."
The spacemen rush towards the reactor.
And Orange takes the opportunity to make the first kill of the match.
He ducks into the left engine room to avoid being seen.
The reactor is fixed!
The Spacemen go back to work...
Until Blue finds Lime's body.
10 turns in, Blue reports Lime's dead body and the spacemen gather for their first emergency meeting.
Hon hon hon. Well, I, ze great detective, am on ze case.
Zes is how detectives speak."
"I already don't trust you now.
Wait, isn't purple my scorned lover?
Or was that pink?"
"Last I saw lime they were heading off with white and pink when I was in storage"
"I know that I, red, white, pink, and blue were in the reactor room
However, zey could have murdered them before heading there.
I do not believe I zaw lime at all.
What a pity."
"Please drop the Poirot bit"
"white has been too quiet"
"Where was the body blue?"
"Unless I’m misreading the map it was in comms"
"I went to weapons and pewpewed some asteroids
Got halfway to cargo before realizing I never grabbed a gun like it looked like everyone else had"
"I was in reactor, walking out"
"So I turned back to the cafe like a dunce"
"I went to shields to do my job, then I went to the cafe to figure out what orange was seeing about the candy bar
then the reactor thing happened"
"I went to shields first and I didn’t see you there Purple."
"Guessing body was far into comms?"
"Red and I were in cargo together for a while"
"i grabbed a pistol before i went to shields
so that might have been it"
"I did too"
"okay, so it's one of us, and I say it's you"
"It didn’t hinder movement"
"oh, wait, i forgot"
"i needed to turn off the water in that first room
so i stayed late there
sorry, memory is bad"
"Well, I can confirm that Red headed in the direction of shields at the beginning. I don't know about Purple.
"Ok am I the only one that thinks Purple is super sus"
"Did anyone else see where Purple went, or confirm their story?"
"The candy bar was because White wasn't acting like himself, talking about shooting Red, so obviously he needed a snickers"
but yeah, orange, yellow, pink and white should have seen me
i assumed the candy bar was like, sabotaged or something lol
i spent time inspecting it"
"So not turning off the water?"
"I mean, I got one for me to so I hope not!"
"i turned off the water, went to shields, then inspected the candy"
"Can anybody confirm?"
"Wait candy bar?"
"What's this about a candy bar?"
"orange ate a candy bar, threw another at the table, then ran off screaming
so i thought the candy bars might have made that happen"
"I passed purple twice while on my mental tirade from weapons, turning back to cafe, then back to cargo again"
"Nah, I remembered my peanut allergy so I snorted all the drugs. Oh right, we're out of drugs. Also, I TOOK SO MANY DRUGS GUYS. IT MADE ME SO MUCH HAPPIER. MORE DRUGS!"
that makes sense
can i go back to doing the poirot bit? i feel it made me seem more trustworthy"
"Hold on Ken, I went to weapons to pew pew asteroids at the beginning and didn't see you there"
"I can assure, it does not make you seem more trustworthy."
"PUKEY GREEN WAS ALIVE! PASSED HIM WHILE GOING TO PLAY WITH PRETTY WIRES, THE BEST WIRES, IN SECURITY ON THE LIKE FIVE MOVE I THINK, THE BAD GUYS MUST HAVE BEEN WAITING THERE! THEN ALARMS WENT OFF, THE BEST ALARMS, BUT THEN THEY STOPPED BECAUSE OF THE BEST WORK! ALWAYS STATION PEOPLE WHERE THE ALARMS WILL BE COMING FROM INSTEAD OF WHERE THE ALARMS WILL NOT BE COMING FROM I ALWAYS SAY! ALSO DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN CARRY BOTH A BEST BOOMY AND A BEST CHOPPY?! I COULDN'T MAKE UP MY MIND SO APPARENTLY THAT MEANS I GOT BOTH! THEY JUST LET YOU DO IT! HERE! SOMEONE TAKE BEST CHOPPY AND USE IT TO TRIM YOUR FINGERNAILS, JUST don't GIVE ME A HAIRCUT WITH IT! MY HAIR IS PERFECT! MY ARMS ARE GETTING TIRED OF CARRYING THE BEST CHOPPY ANYWAYS! IF YOU SEE THE BAD GUY STAB SOMEONE, STAB THE BAD GUY BACK WITH THE BEST CHOPPY, AND REMEMBER WHO GAVE IT TO YOU! IT WASN'T THEBLACKDOG, IT WAS ME! WE NEED TO RESTOCK MEDBAY, STOP AT THE NEXT GAS STATION AND HEAD OUT BACK TO THE DARK ALLEY! WAIT, I'M THE ONE WHO IS SUPPOSED TO STEER US INTO THE ROCKS! NO WAIT, AWAY FROM ROCKS! PRETTY PRETTY ROCKS! WE SHOULD GO CLOSER FOR A BETTER LOOK! I AM THE BEST PILOT WHO WILL STEER YOU PAST THE BIGGEST ROCKS! AND DEAL WITH EVERYTHING ELSE PROBABLY! THE ROCKS WILL LET US RESTOCK OUR MED BAY! sniffle
APPARENTLY PEOPLE DON'T TRUST THE RED WHITE AND BLUE! COMMIES! PURPLE THOUGH, PURPLE PURPLE PURPLE WANTS MORE TO DIE! I LIKE BEING ALIVE, AND SO SHOULD YOU! I'M THE BEST AT BEING ALIVE! WE WILL ALL BE ALIVE! PUKEY GREEN WAS DUMB, I LIKE MY SPACEMEN WHO DON'T DIE! sniffle
A VOTE TO SKIP IS A VOTE TO WIN! UNLESS OF COURSE THE BAD GUYS WANT TO STOP BEING COWARDS AND ADMIT WHO THEY ARE! THERE WAS A LOT OF TIME THAT PUKEY GREEN COULD HAVE BEEN DEAD APPARENTLY! THE SMELL WAS PROBABLY TERRIBLE OR WAS SUPER FRESH BECAUSE INSTANT KILL MAYBEsniffle
THE SO CALLED EXPERTS DON'T KNOW ANYTHING, WE NEED MORE INFORMATION, SO CATCH THEM IN THE VENTS I SAY! NOW LET'S GET MORE DRUGS! DRUGS THAT WILL MAKE US IMMUNE TO THE BAD GUYS! IT'S COMING SOON, VERY SOON, SO SOON YOU'LL BE ALL LIKE "I'M SO SURPRISED YOU GOT THIS TO US SO SOON" sniffle