BJORKWARS 2: ELEKTRIK BJORKALOO - RAGNAVERSARY SPECIAL EDITION

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Bookwyrm
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Re: BJORKWARS 2: ELEKTRIK BJORKALOO - RAGNAVERSARY SPECIAL EDITION

Post by Bookwyrm » Fri Nov 06, 2020 12:57 am

(Recommended Listening)


Paradisa Isle. Ruins of the Large HardOn Kollider. Seekers of Truth Outpost.

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Dr. Solis: Status report.

F-Class: Readings are still stable, our systems are approximately... 43% of the way through analyzing the balance levels of the anomaly.

Dr. Solis: Have you isolated the levels of Quantum Residue absorbed from the ruins of the partikle akselerator from the Nega-Energy wavelengths the object itself emits?

F-Class: Still working on that, Doctor. We’ll inform you once we’ve made progress on that front.

Dr. Solis: Very well. Doctor Quigley, do you have anything to report from the geological survey?


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Dr. Quigley: Uhhhhhhh not too much to talk about, this place is pretty fucking wrecked. There doesn’t seem to be any infrastructure remaining after whoever it was bombed the living hell out of here. They also picked it clean of anything that could even remotely be considered useful.

Dr. Solis: Damn. Okay, bring the drone back in, I need you and your man to come with me to talk to our friends.

Head F-Class: Aw, do I have to? They kinda creep me out...

Dr. Solis: Don’t be a baby, and go get the spice dispenser.

Head F-Class: *sigh* Right away, doc.

Dr. Quigley: I still don’t know what they think is so important about this thing.

Dr. Solis: That’s why we’re going to ask them.


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Machine Elf Elder: <F0r wh47 r3450n d0 y0u c4ll f0r u5?>

Dr. Solis: We’re here at the energy confluence you revealed to us. The source of the surge detected was a massive nuclear explosion on the site of a Quantum Reality Manipulation engine, and somehow, that energy fed into some kind of anomalous NegaVerse matter to create this… well we don’t know exactly what it is. Something like a gigantic egg. We want to know why you and your people think that this is important.

Machine Elf Elder: <W3 p455 n0 jud93m3n7 0n 7h3 4n0m4ly’5 1mp0r74nc3, 0nly 4dv153 y0u 7h47 17’5 pr0p3r7135 w1ll b3 3xc3p710n4lly u53ful 70 y0ur c4u53.>

Dr. Quigley: That doesn’t really answer the question, though.

Dr. Solis: They’re right, combinations of Quantum and Nega energy at these levels are extremely rare, we might be able to tap this to power an entire research complex on this site, including a whole array of A-Gates. If we can manage to get a handle on it, this could be our new primary site of operations in this area of the Brikverse.

Dr. Quigley: That’s great and all, but what I want to know is what do we—


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*—— O - O - P - !

Dr. Solis: Oh for the love of science what is it now??

Head F-Class: Over there! By the anomaly! Its… what is that??

Machine Elf: <7h15 d15rup710n h45 7h3 519n47ur3 0f Qu4n7um 5urf3r5, y0u mu57 53cur3 7h3 4r34 1mm3d1473ly. 7h15 15 5ur3 70 4l73r 4 num83r 0f v4r148l35…>


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Arkbrik: Where… where ARE we?

Insert_Blank: An island

Scratch: We can *see that,* genius, but what kind of island? Also, where’s that fucking Recrooter, when I get ahold of him he’s going to WISH he had the luxury of sleeping with the fishes.

Almighy Benny: Better question; what in the FUCK is that thing?


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Dr. Solis: No no no no no! Get away from that, you’re going to ruin everything!

RunsWithLegos: Whoa lady, chill, we’re not going to mess with your gross weird egg thing

Rev. Sylvanus: We’re just trying to get a grip on what happened here. Why did the Nega-Muhreen bring us here?

Food_Truk: *whispers* And why does this place seem so familiar somehow?

Dr. Quigley: Look, I have absolutely zero clue who any of you are, but did you say that a Negaverse entity brought you here?

AtlasOfTheStars: A Nega-Muhreen hijacked our teleport system to bring us here instead of the abandoned island we were trying to get to.

Head F-Class: Well that’s not at all ominous.


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Green: Hey, wait a minute, I know that symbol! You guys are part of the Seekers of Truth!

Dr. Solis: And you are…?

Green: I AM THE QUANTUM SURFER, THE TRUE SELF!

Dr. Solis:

Green: I’m Green. I made Legotavia. Your boss knows me?

Dr. Solis: Ah, yes. The Grand Matron’s… er, uh…

Dr. Quigley: Boy-toy?

Dr. Solis: I was trying to avoid being so gauche, but sure.

Green: Okay first of all, rude. Second, what is she having you all do here with this… eggy looking thing?


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Dr. Solis: You assume mistakenly that this is at her behest. The Grand Matron’s influence back in our home galaxy is absolute, but out here, in the greater span of the Brikverse, our efforts are focused on more... practical endeavors than her meddling politics and schemes. The Konvergent Brikverse Survey and Acquisitions Task-Force is here to secure this anomalous object and the surrounding island and re-build the base here into an advance outpost for expanding out into the KonVerse shard network, and we don’t have time for any interruptions, even by higher beings like yourself, so if you could please step away from the anomaly--

F-Class: Uhh Doctor Solis?

Dr. Solis: WHAT?? What is it now???

F-Class: W-we’re receiving some kind of audio transmission. We’re not sure exactly what it means… You should probably have a listen…

Dr. Solis: ...What the hell? Is that chanting? Something about a bell… and… tacos??


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*nyoooooooooooooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOMKRASHHHHHHHH!!!!!1!!!!!!!*

*MUZIC BLATSTING SUPER LOWD*


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Rooks: I'M AT THE PIZZA HUT! I'M AT THE TACO BELL! I'M AT THE COMBINATION PIZZA HUT AND TACO BELL!

Frobo: Now iz de tiem, bruthers! LES’T SHOW THE QYANTUN SURVARS WHY NOT 2 MEDSS WIF TEH POWIR OF FRENDSHILP AN CONCACVE DOLFIN

Food_Truk: FFFFFUUUUUUUUUCCCCCKKKK we need to get the hell out of here RIGHT NOW.

Spectral: I must still be reaaly drunk/blazed because that looks like a guy with a sharpie fr a face

Bookwyrm: You’re seeing it right. That’s the Horseman of Poop, Frobo the Swaggins.

Quantumsurfer: This is bad. Zupponn, can we move the con building again?

Zupponn: No dice, tried that already. Something is locking down dimensional jumping in this area; you can teleport in but you can’t teleport out.

Dr. Quigley: That’s not us, just preemptively clarifying that fact.


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Silasw: Aren’t the Horsemen supposed to be trapped in the black hole? We JUST had a conversation about this, like ten minutes ago!

Ninja_Bait: Yeahhhhh, well Frobo was kind of a special case. He got yeeted into a Nega-Sphinkter and never showed back up for the rest of the battle, we honestly didn’t think he was much of a problem after that.

Noktu: Well he’s definitely a problem now!

Frobo: haHA, DAM SKIPPIE he iz! Now! Nenga-Nite! Releanse the crackin!

Nega-Knight: My pleasure, Master the Swaggins!

Dr. Solis: NO! Keep them aw-


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*tuch*

Dr. Solis: ...Away from it…

lordintype: Shit.

*rrrRRUMBLE…*



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*krik!*

F-Class: Doctor! Shell integrity is rapidly decreasing!

DayBoost_: It’s cracking!

Scribonius: You mean... it’s hatching...

*krACKle* *KRunCH*

???: *sssssskkkkkkrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr*

Space Bunny: Uhhhh I don’t like the sound of that...


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*crACKKK!*

???: *SSKRRRR???*

Braggalot: What in the fuck...

Stubby/Food_Truk: Oh HELL naw.

Kastrenzo: Fuckin... who... ...Whiteagle?!

???: *KRLLLSSSSSKK...*

Falk: That’s not Whiteagle, or at least not anymore. Some kind of clone? It doesn’t look right...

Whiteagle Clone???: *KKRREEEEEEEEEEE?!?!?!*

SilentSigfig: shiiiiit everyone get back!



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*KRONCH!* *KRAK!*


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Skyfall Whiteagle: *WWHHHHHHEEEEEEKREEEEEEEEEEEEEEKEEEEEEEEEEEESKEEEEEEEEEERRRR!!*

BFenix: Ho Lee Fuck

Duerer: What in the name of the CREATOR.

Shadowscythe: Somebody do something FAST, what the hell...

RedRover: SigFig Ability: [P R O C R A S T I N A T I O N !]


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*SLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWW W W W W W W W W W*

RedRover: That will buy us some time, but we only have a few minutes!

Primrose: What are we going to do? That thing is going to collectively tear us a new asshole!

Bolicob: The only thing we can do at this point. We fight.

Zupponn: So much for the battle royale plan…

Quantumsurfer: All of that needs to take a backseat now. We’re all in this predicament together, time to get a grip and focus on the true enemy; the Negaverse forces. They’ve figured out that they’re stronger as a team, no better time for the Far-Ums to figure it out too.

Ninja_Bait: On that note, I might have something in mind actually. Kast, I’ll need you to help me if we want to make this work.

Kastrenzo: Fine, what do you need from me?

Bookwyrm: While you two get that set up, the rest of you, suit up as quickly as you can. This is not going to be an easy fight.


[NEXT]

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