My latest character may be my new favorite (eclipsing even the retard Grognak the Green and his more eloquent cousin Bragnak the Brown)...
A redguard, hating water and sailing and the heat, wandered off to Skyrim. He ended up with some whiny rebels and was about to be executed. Upon several attempts to tell the dumfounded Nord working the execution list his name, the Nord just shrugged and wrote "Iben." Goddamn barbarians. All was going well, except that the Imperials skipped the guy they wanted dead to kill some angry rebel (a man after Iben's own heart) and then allowed the execution to delay further because of some angry dragon. Some running and some fire later, it was clear he had a choice to make: the head-block happy Imperials or the whiney why-me Stormcloaks. After standing around for a few minutes, looking for option C (Oblivion with this I'm out), the dragon landed and camp tromping after Iben, forcing him to escape with Mr. Sorry-Just-Following-Orders.
Some more running, stabbed some Stormcloaks that were all sword-happy, killed some spiders (blech) and a bear (pelt!), and off to visit his rustic blacksmith uncle.
On second that, Oblivion with that, time to go anywhere but 'You should join the legion that tried to kill you" kid's summer village. So, wearing His Last Clean Shirt, Iben set off to find a decent vacation in Skyrim.
It's a secret to everybody.